The front of Melanie’s house was next to the road, but the back lawn had a different neighbour bordering each of the three sides.
Melanie had a little dog, of which she was most fond. It was a Pomeranian and its name was Pom-Pom. In fact, Melanie got on better with her dog than she did with the three bordering neighbours.
You’ve no idea, said Melanie, what Anita Jones is up to. Her husband’s corpse was still warm and she was out cavorting with another man. And then barely three weeks had passed and he’d moved in. Moved in! Anita Jones, I’m telling you this to your face. You’re a cheap harlot. That’s all. Cheap harlot! My Pom-Pom has more principles.
Herbie Davidson, said Melanie, is overweight and disgusting. He walks around in his back yard wearing only his underpants. He’s too fat to do that. He’s gross from top to toe. Nor has he any manners. Herbie Davidson, I’m telling you this to your face. You’re a grotesque, obese piece of lard. That’s all. Lazy lard! My Pom-Pom has more principles.
And as for you, Andy McAlister, we all know you watch porn. You sit at your computer half the night grovelling over it. I can see it through the window. I’ve a good mind to report you to the police, you filthy-minded pig. Andy McAlister, I’m telling you this to your face. You’re a dirty gutter rat. That’s it. Gutter rat! My Pom-Pom has more principles.
One day Melanie saw rat poison tablets scattered on her back lawn. Pom-Pom must have eaten one. It was dead.
I think Pom-Pom committed suicide. His principles wouldn’t allow him to live with Melanie another day!!
LOL!! And with a name like Pom-Pom, who wouldn’t?!!
My money’s on Anita. Herbie’s too lazy, and Andy couldn’t leave his computer long enough to buy rat pellets.
Anita is probably too busy in the bedroom!
Colonel Mustard in the library with a candle stick???
Let’s hope the flame flickers and dies!
Melanie was begging for it loud and clear. But the end is mischievously poised. Maybe Melanie staged it all to make it look like murder. Perhaps she is jealous of Anita? Anyway, an untangled whodunit is much more interesting.
“An untangled whodunit” could be the name for a best seller.
Another curious incident
When one is house-hunting one doesn’t have too much time for anything. Yet another reject for a perfect house today! – 18 families applied – what hope is there!?
Damn
See my reply to Uma below!
Let’s hope the trip is worth it
There’s hope – and the town is called Stratford!!
Perhaps a good omen
That is frustratingly ridiculous. This is stuff from comic-apocalyptic fiction such as Catch 22. Unfortunately, that has translated into reality.
Catch 23 perhaps! Good news: the “rude” rental lady from beneath the volcano phoned out of the blue and said she has a house she would like us to look at before she advertises it in public! So we hope it’s good and are travelling to look at it next Sunday (involves driving 6 hours on Saturday and another 6 hours back home on Sunday – all in our old truck!) It means that we are accepted provided we like the place!
Hope that works out well!
Melanie obviously talked out loud in her backyard. I think the fat guy was the culprit – if he’s walking around in the backyard he would have overheard her!
She might even have been sleep-walking being dog tired…
My money’s on Anita, she obviously murdered her husband.
Bad luck! I’m keeping your money! For some reason your comment went into the spam queue. WordPress seems to be playing up at times these days in the comment department…