871. Saved by the Government

The Government Minister of Finance couldn’t stop grinning from ear to ear. Beaming is hardly the word. The smile was so broad you could see his gums.

Scientists, on a Government grant, have discovered that bacon can possibly cause cancer.

“There’s only one thing for it,” said the Minister of Finance, “we have to discourage people from eating bacon by taxing it heavily.”

And tax it they did. And then…

Scientists, on a Government grant, have discovered that ham can possibly cause cancer.

“There’s only one thing for it,” said the Minister of Finance, “we have to discourage people from eating ham by taxing it heavily.”

And tax it they did. And then…

Scientists, on a Government grant, have discovered that all meat can possibly cause cancer.

“There’s only one thing for it,” said the Minister of Finance, “we have to discourage people from eating meat by taxing it heavily.”

And tax it they did. And then…

Scientists, on a Government grant, have discovered that food can possibly cause cancer.

“There’s only one thing for it,” said the Minister of Finance, “we have to discourage people from eating altogether by taxing it heavily.”

And tax it they did. And then…

The Government got re-elected because, in these hard times, they’ve done wonders with the economy.

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