3005. Tarts

26 Replies

Let’s face it, Winifred, mother of four, absolutely detested Marion her neighbour. The problem was that Marion was constantly calling in and telling Winifred what  was being done wrong in the children’s upbringing.

Things came to a crunch when Marion – in Winifred’s very house – admonished the four children in front of their mother. Winifred had had enough. She shouted for Marion to “GET OUT!”

Later, Winifred regretted shouting. She baked a plate of jam tarts and sent the four children over with a note of apology. Back the children came! Marion had received the jam tarts with delight. And the four children were enjoying a jam tart each.

Winifred didn’t notice the children eating. She was too busy wondering how long it would take for the poison to work.

26 thoughts on “3005. Tarts”

          1. Badfinger (Max)

            Oh ok… I have heard the word crust for all of my life like in a pie crust. I never knew it wasn’t a proper word! What do you call a pie crust?

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply ↓
            1. Bruce Goodman Post author

              We call a bread crust a crust. We use “crusty” to mean a person is outspoken and surly. Used especially of older people. But the dictionary said that “crust” can also mean unabashed self-assertiveness; nerve; gall. We also use crust to mean ones job: What do you do for a crust?

              Liked by 3 people

              Reply ↓
              1. obbverse

                Crust is old slang for ‘skull, brain’ too. ‘You’re doing my crust in’ I remember hearing. I believe it was my Maths teacher speaking to me about the thickness of my skull.

                Bottom of the class in Maths for me!

                Liked by 1 person

                Reply ↓
  7. Kvizee Doug

    “Regretted shouting… and note of apology”
    Ah yes, I think I recognize this unreliable narrator: That raconteur used to live at the end of our block on our street at the culpabilité-de-sac dead end. Said: don’t worry about the serial killed who lives next door to you because she only eats gingerbread children.
    Crusty the Clown from the cartoon “The Simpsons” said, let them eat tarts and brioche and let tarts be tarts.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply ↓

Please feel free to spout, tout, flout, sprout, pout, or simply say something sensible