2286. Three friends

Graham was recently widowed and apparently was not doing too well with the grief. His wife Euphemia has passed away suddenly. He had two close friends – Benjie and Shane. Benjie was the practical joker and Shane was a little more serious.

Benjie had heard that Graham was a bit down in the dumps so he thought he’d play a bit of a trick. He was a master at imitating people. He phoned Graham and pretended to be Shane.

As soon as Graham heard Shane’s “voice”, he said: “Hi Shane. Great to hear from you. We haven’t spoken since you gave me a hand to murder Euphemia.”

1302. The daily ritual

Vijay always lit a little candle on his sideboard every evening while he ate his dinner. It burned only for half an hour or so, next to a small framed photograph of his late wife. The candle was Vijay’s little daily ritual.

One day at the market, Vijay met Dorothea. They got on like a house on fire. They went out a couple of times. Dorothea phoned just as Vijay had lit the candle and was about to have his dinner. Would Vijay like to get some takeaways and come around to her apartment? She had a bottle of wine.

What a great idea! Vijay’s prepared dinner was put in the fridge for another time. Hurry! Hurry!

Anyway, he has now moved into Dorothea’s apartment; since his house burned down.

1269. Don’t bother waking me

Noel had been a widower for three years. He lived alone.

His life-time friends, Nancy and Bert, said, “Why don’t you come up to our summer house in the woods for a few days?” So Noel did that. This was his third year going for a short time.

On the first evening they had a few drinks and chatted and reminisced. And then it was time for bed.

“Don’t bother waking me in the morning,” said Noel.

And indeed, they could not have if they tried.

1081. Lost the will

Vvivia’s parents had been rather creative when naming their daughter, and when she was all grown-up it was clear that Vvivia had inherited a great deal of their creativity.

Vvivia was widowed when rather young, and her departed spouse, who had been a lot older, left her a considerable sum. It was not long before Vvivia recovered and remarried. Again she married an older widower. His name was George Stenton.

The first thing George did was to rewrite his will, leaving all to his new wife. A few months after the wedding Vvivia left George; a no good husband; absolutely no good; not what she was expecting. George rewrote his will again, leaving everything to his sons and daughters from his first marriage.

Not long after, George died. There had, according to Vvivia, been a reconciliation.

I, Vvivia Stenton, swear that since the death of my husband, George Stenton, I have had access to his papers and repositories and I have searched diligently therein for any will or testamentary writing made or signed by the said deceased and that I have been unable to find any such will or testamentary writing. I do verily believe that the said deceased died intestate and that I am his widow.

Vvivia went on to marry again, in fact, several times. She was able to comfortably retire from pursuing her hobby by the age of thirty-seven.

843. Best bit of bad luck

Hester’s husband of just a year died suddenly, just a month short of their first baby. Now, twelve months down the track, Hester was still trying to cope, still trying to make ends meet, still trying to provide the best for baby Jack.

She went for a walk with Jack. That’s how she met Conway. He was a solo dad. He was out taking baby Roland for a walk. Hester and Conway got on like a house on fire. It was a whirlwind romance, surrounded by toddlers’ clothes, and all that.

Anyway, they got married and had another four kids. And although it was always sad that both had lost their spouses at an early age, both agreed on one thing: it was the best bit of bad luck that could have happened.

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