Tag Archives: whale

1138. Whalewhotamus

Genetic engineering had certainly come a long way when Rick Bergeron Ph.D. decided to cross a hippopotamus with a whale. Apparently they are fairly close genetic relations. They were not to be crossed exactly the way a horse and a donkey can be. Doctor Rick was to share genetic material and implant it in a female whale to see what would happen.

He was renowned for his skill. He was the one who had taken DNA from a guanlong remnant and brought them back into existence after millions of years. He was able to show that the crest at the top of its head wasn’t simply for sex appeal but served other purposes as well. And they had feathers! The guanlong bred like flies and eventually had to be exterminated because of the earth’s inability to feed them adequately. Whole flocks of sheep would disappear overnight.

The time drew nigh for the birth of the world’s first whalewhotamus. Planet Earth was hushed!

It drowned.

419. Whale of a tale

419arion

Arion, of Ancient Greece, was a musician of consummate ability. He could play the lyre like it was going out of fashion. He could sing too. The music didn’t bring in much money.

Back in those days the music industry was in its infancy. One had to appear in person. You couldn’t “cut a record” or even record something on video. So Arion used to enter every music competition there was, in order to put food on the table.

One day he sailed by boat to some prestigious music event and came first. He got bags of gold.

Travelling back home, the captain of the ship grew greedy and threw Arion overboard. The captain stole Arion’s gold.

But as luck would have it, Arion was saved by dolphins. While he was on the back of a dolphin (being saved) Arion had a thought. This thought could make him heaps of money.

Today he hunts whales for the Japanese Government. It’s part of their “Scientific Research” programme. When the scientists finish with the whale, Arion sells the meat on the Japanese market. He’s as rich as buggery and threw away the lyre.