Tag Archives: water

1405. Cold water

Eight year old Annie wanted to go to Disneyland but her mother said she couldn’t afford it. Annie came up with an idea. It was a hot day. She would sell cold water at the gate.

The water wasn’t really that cold. It had been in the fridge only for a little while. Annie made a sign:

COLD WATER 5 sents Help me get to Dinseyland

All sorts of kind people passing by purchased a drink of water. Some even paid more than the five cents. By the middle of the afternoon, Annie had collected seven dollars fifteen. Then a bossy lady turned up:

“You want to get to Disneyland? I’ll get you to Disneyland. Where’s your licence to sell water? I’m phoning the police.”

The bossy lady phoned the police and a policeman turned up and made Annie shut down her business. But the reporters were there too from the local television station. The bossy lady had phoned them as well.

By sundown an outraged millionaire had paid for Annie’s entire family to go to Disneyland.

1215. Nematodes

When Merle read in the waiting room of Hair and Nails Beauty Salon that there were nematodes invisible to the naked eye swimming in her drinking water she just about threw up. She almost painted the walls of the beauty parlour with psychedelic chunder. For years Merle had thought she had eaten meat-free and then suddenly… a revelation…

Of course, she could boil the water first, but that would be no different from boiling a leg of mutton. She’d still be swallowing boiled meat, albeit dead worms. Distilled water from the shop was no solution. The nematodes had been ruthlessly murdered so the water could be sold in all its purity. She would not be party to such dastardly actions.

Merle’s husband, when told, had no such qualms. He had eaten meat wholehearted all his life, and thought that having digestible-friendly worms in his water simply added to things.

There was only one thing for it; from now on Merle would drink nothing but Coca Cola. So much more animal friendly. So much healthier. So much cheaper than buying bottled water.

1186. Boiled chicken

Thank you for posting the fabulous boiled chicken recipe. It was so simple to do; just chicken boiled in water. My family are vegans, so I left out the chicken. All agreed it was the loveliest meal I’d cooked in years. It’s certainly a recipe I shall be repeating and one I can’t wait to share with guests.

898. Grandma Margaret’s begonia

898begonia

Grandma Margaret was given a beautiful red begonia in a terracotta pot the shape of an old boot. It was beautiful!

And then the begonia died! Well, these things can’t last forever. Grandma Margaret put the terracotta pot with the dead plant in a corner of her carport.

A grandson visited.

“Grandma, what’s with the clay pot the shape of a boot?”

“I had a beautiful red begonia growing in it, but it died. These things can’t last forever.”

Grandma Margaret’s grandson watered the soil in the terracotta clay pot. The begonia sprouted. It flowered a beautiful red.

“It just needed a bit of water, Grandma.”