2468. Chants and hakas

Story 2468 is significant enough a number to deviate into reality. When we were kids, “Two four six eight” was the grace before meals when mum and dad weren’t there:

Two four six eight, bog in, don’t wait.

Two four six eight was also the prefix to a chant at sports gatherings:

Two four six eight, who do we appreciate?

The winner’s name would then be chanted.

Another chant in that ilk was to spell the sports person’s name:

Give us an S
Give us an M
Give us an I
Give us a T
Give us an H
What have you got?
SMITH! SMITH! SMITH!

Of course that chant doesn’t work if the name is Barakat-Bentinckstokes.

My favourite chant (apart from Let’s go Brandon) requires a bit of explaining:

The High School I went to (and also taught at for a decade) was situated in the countryside. It was a large all-boys boarding school catering mainly at the time to sons of isolated farming families throughout the country. Hence the school itself was attached to a farm. The biggest (and oldest) annual athletics occasion was called the McEvedy Shield. Four major all-boys schools met to compete in some large stadium. The entire roll of each school would attend. Chants and hakas abounded. A haka is a traditional Maori challenge and each school in New Zealand has its own. The video shows two opposing high school teams challenging each other before a rugby match. (Incidentally, a “College” in New Zealand is the same as a High School).

At the McEvedy Shield around 2 o’clock the three opposing schools would unite and begin chanting at my school:

Go home! Milking time! Go home! Milking time!

I always found the Milking Time Chant very entertaining, and if anything it highlighted the positive camaraderie between the four competitive schools.

Perhaps you have a favourite chant?

1102. On the blink

Brenda Clifford didn’t realize she was lonely until her television went on the blink.

Angela Charlesworth didn’t realize her marriage was on the rocks until her television went on the blink.

Geoff Craighead didn’t realize he was feeding his kids junk food until his television went on the blink.

Anthony Barlow didn’t realize he believed everything on the news until his television went on the blink.

Augusta Lorrigan didn’t realize she was drinking herself to death until her television went on the blink.

Lou Monks didn’t realize how untidy the house was until his television went on the blink.

When Rod Watson’s television went on the blink he didn’t notice anything except that his television was on the blink. He went out and bought another television and installed it before the sports game started. He bought some beer on the way home, told his wife and kids to shut up, burped, farted, and settled down for the night.