Tag Archives: Mother's Day

2421. Happy Birthing Personage Day!

Ever since he was four Caleb had wanted to be an otorhinolaryngologist when he grew up. No one knows why he suddenly developed at interest in otorhinolaryngology but he did. As his birthing personage observed, at first we thought it was simply a vestige of aberrant behaviour instilled in him at the kindergarten, but we quickly disabused ourselves of the notion when he threatened that if he didn’t get his way he would become a teacher instead and espouse transgender critical race theory.

We hoped that the special book we bought him for his fifth birthday would help sort a few things out, but already Little Miss Muffat and Little Jack Horner are doing things behind the bike shed that we didn’t give a thought to doing before Year 11. As for Jack and Jill falling down the hill and Humpty-Dumpty falling off a wall… well… it simply consolidated his interest in otorhinolaryngology.

We dread the day when he gets to page 23 of his “Birthing Personage Goose” book that we gave him and discovers over-sexed Little Bo Peep and what Jack-Be-Nimble is doing to Peep’s sheep.

We’re thinking of dumping his childhood altogether and getting him started on harmless Quantum Mechanics.