Tag Archives: looks

1247. You are almost

There’s no need to fret and get upset. All I said was “You’re almost skinny enough to be a model”. I meant it as a compliment. It’s true – you are almost skinny enough to be a model. There’s nothing wrong with that. There’s no need to get upset about it.

Try to remember the positive – like the time you were fat and repulsive and you decided to do something about it. And you did. You lost a lot of unnecessary weight and you should be proud of what you’ve achieved and not upset about it. Of course, going on a diet like you did, can’t do anything about looks. That’s not my responsibility. Nor yours, to be frank. You can’t improve the face God gave you without a great deal of expense. Yet, you are almost pretty enough to be a model.

But being overweight is something you can do something about, and you did. Although all your old clothes no longer fit, and you look like a rag doll, that’s no reason to spend most of your time in tears, blubbering away like some God-forsaken lamb dressed as mutton. If you could perhaps adapt your clothes a bit I would say that you would almost be dressed well enough to be a model.

So, to sum up: you are almost skinny enough to be a model, you are almost pretty enough to be a model, and you would almost be dressed well enough to be a model to advertise the can of beans on our supermarket brochure. But you don’t quite tip the scales.

Next!

1202. Love at first sight

It’s love at first sight. In fact, I hope we find enough money to afford to get married one day. She lights up my life. I think about her all the time. I’ve most definitely got to buy that engagement ring.

Everything about her is stunning! Her looks! Her personality! Even her taste in clothes. She’s almost a fashion icon. Her laughter is like the sound of gentle bells wafting from a beautiful spire down the valley of life. Her eyes, I swear, are diamonds.

Now, I’ve just got to get her to notice me.