Tag Archives: joke

1737. A funny story

There’s no doubt that Ross knew how to tell a good joke. Some people can’t tell jokes; they mess up the punchline and things are never very funny. But Ross, goodness me! He could make people fall off their chairs with mirth.

The only trouble was that Ross would often laugh uproariously at his own joke and sometimes would start his uncontrollable laughter even before the joke was finished. When the joke was over, everyone could see why he was laughing. It was always immensely funny.

I’ll give an example:

Once there was this fellow called Fred. He was a farmer and he had three sheep. The first sheep was black, the second sheep was white, and the third sheep was white with a black face. When Farmer Fred took his sheep to the market the stall-seller of home-grown organic cabbages asked: “How much are you asking for the sheep?”

And Fred said… ha ha ha ha ha ha ha… And Fred said… ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haw haw hee hee hee hee hee… ha ha ha ha ha ha haw haw hee hee hee hee.. And Fred said…

Ross was laughing so hard that he almost wet himself. He almost died laughing. And that was when he had a brain haemorrhage.

801. Isobel’s little joke

801joke

Isobel was having a dinner party; just a few people; just seven visitors in all. That would make eight table settings. After all, her dinner set had just the eight placings.

Isobel even partly planned the conversation. It never hurts, does it? to have a few topics up ones sleeve in the event of a conversation lull. And a joke! Isobel even had a little joke at the ready, just in case.

What a delightful evening! Several of the guests had never met before and seemed to get on fine. There was hardly a lull in the conversation. It was dessert time. Isobel thought she would tell her joke.

There was this old lady who lived next door to an air force base, so she thought she would invite some of the staff for dinner. She cooked a chicken. When she was carving the chicken, she asked a few questions.
“And what do you do?”
“I’m on the Ground Staff,” said the first.
“It’s a chicken leg for you. And what do you do?” she asked the second.
“I’m a Wing Commander.”
“It’s a chicken wing for you. And what do you do?” she asked the third.
“I’m a Rear Admiral, but I’m not hungry.”

Everyone laughed at Isobel’s little joke.

“I’m a Rear Admiral, but I’m not hungry,” repeated Isabel. It was as if by repeating the punchline she could extend the merriment of her joke. Everyone laughed again, so Isobel repeated the punchline yet again.

The merriment of Isobel’s repetitive punchline protracted extension had somewhat waned. And then Isobel started to giggle at her own joke’s success. That made other people giggle. They all giggled at nothing, and then Leonard hooted out loud and they all hooted. What a hoot!

Isobel was pleased with her little dinner party. It was such a success! Such a lovely evening! Quite, quite delightful!

To listen to the story being read click HERE!