Tag Archives: Honolulu

2188. Talula Does the Hula

It was preposterous, said the judge. The poor little girl’s parents had named her Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii. The parents must have been drunk when they settled on a name. The little girl had told everyone that her name was Kay. Few knew that her registered name was Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii.

Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii was currently the victim of a custody battle, which is why she came to court and her name came to light.

The mother explained that Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii was conceived in Honolulu while they were on vacation. It was normal in her culture to name a child after something significant that occurred from conception until birth. Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii seemed reasonable at the time.

The father during the custody battle was nowhere to be seen. Your explanation seems reasonable, said the judge. I hereby award Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii to the custody of her mother, Hole In The Condom.

606. Funeral savings

© Bruce Goodman 8 June 2015


Jimmy was old and dying. Patrick, his nephew and godson, was with him.

“Paddy,” said Jimmy, “when I go my final will and funeral instructions are in the top drawer.”

Jimmy died. Paddy opened the drawer. There was the final will and, on a separate piece of paper, the funeral instructions.

Jimmy had left everything to Paddy. Everything! Once the funeral expenses were paid for.

“He has rather expensive tastes when it comes to funerals,” thought Paddy.

He went to see the undertaker and arranged the cheapest funeral possible.

On the way home he called into the Travel Agency and booked an extended vacation to Honolulu on the funeral savings.