1947. Seasonal Alphonso

Alphonso hated the Spring Equinox. It meant we’re heading towards summer, which is hot, sticky, and utterly uncomfortable.

Alphonso hated the Summer Solstice. It meant the hottest months are on their way.

Alphonso hated the Autumn Equinox. It meant we’re heading towards winter, which is cold, icy, and utterly uncomfortable.

Alphonso hated the Winter Solstice. It meant the coldest months are on their way.

Alphonso hated the weather on television. “They’re forever predicting bad weather. I’ll watch once they start being a bit more positive.”

1642. Rain! Rain! Rain!

(The photo is taken from my desk!)

Rain! Rain! Rain! It was always raining! It had so flooded Hedley’s backyard pot plants that they were dying. He must somehow bring them inside. Perhaps put them in his garage if there was enough light.

There were large puddles on his driveway. The spouting in front of his sitting room window was overflowing down onto his rose garden. His vegetable garden was so saturated that it was not only impossible to gather vegetables, but the vegetables were rotting in the ground. His lawn was a mud pool.

Rain! Rain! Rain!

Hedley woke with a start in the armchair where he had dozed. The stifling heat of this two-month long summer drought was starting to get to him. The city’s ban on garden watering meant most of his usually wonderful garden had shrivelled up. Oh for rain! Rain! Rain!

640. Hot shopping

© Bruce Goodman 12 July 2015

It was one of those hot, hot, sticky summer days. Wade sat in his living room in front of an electric fan taking turns holding up one armpit after the other in an effort to cool off. He still had the grocery shopping to do, so eventually he bit the bullet and off he went.

Wade always kept his wallet in his trouser pocket, so he didn’t even bother to check to make sure it was there.

At the supermarket he followed his grocery list and got most things, and at least the shop was a bit cooler thanks to air conditioning. Then he thought (it wasn’t on his list but he thought it would be a good idea) he’d buy a couple of bottles of cold cordial drink or something, but he couldn’t find any that were cold. They all seemed to be in the normal shelves. So he asked a shop assistant where the cold drinks in the fridge were, and she said I thought you were going to ask me where the condoms were.

What a stupid idiot, thought Wade. I might be heading for forty and look about thirty, and am not that bad looking overall, but that proposition on a hot day came from nowhere. Quite frankly it pissed him off. So he said “Ho! Ho! Ho!” like he was Santa Claus or someone, and she eventually told him where the cold drinks were.

Then he went out through the cashier, and went to pay for all his stuff but his wallet wasn’t in his pocket.

In fact it might have been in his pocket, but he’d forgotten to put on his trousers.