Tag Archives: dreams

1032. News flash

Mrs Myrtle Capstick, a widow, has struck it lucky. She had a dream with the lottery’s winning numbers. She used those numbers and is now $1,000,000 richer.

“I knew the minute I woke up that these were my lucky numbers, so I wrote them down,” said an overwhelmed Mrs Capstick.

Dr Harry Shinburg, Professor of Mathematics at the University of Myrtlebridge, said the chances of that happening were astronomical. “It’s astronomical enough getting all six numbers in a row, but to get them in a dream is astronomically astronomical”.

Vladimir Staffordshire, secretary of the Sceptics’ Society, said that sadly there was no creature in a parallel universe waving the numbers at Mrs Capstick in a dream. “It’s a fluke,” he said. “That’s all it is. There’s nothing preternatural about it.”

Over three hundred comments have been made on the social media. Many say they’ve had a similar experience, although the prize money has been considerably smaller. Norma Booner said, “Wow! Wow! One million! In a dream! Wow!”

“I’m just over the moon,” said Mrs Capstick. “Just over the moon. I received these numbers in a dream. Call it what you will, it happened. Ironically, the first thing I want to buy with my money is a new bed and mattress. If only my husband was still alive to share the excitement! Who said dreams don’t come true? I’ve never won a penny before. To think, after forty-seven years of taking these same dreamed numbers and it’s at last paid off!”

782. Nolan orders a book

782dream

Poor old Nolan was having vivid dreams. They were not nice. In them people he knew were always dying. He told his doctor about the dreams and she waved her hand in the air and said, “For goodness sake, they’re just dreams, so get on with it.”

Nolan was not satisfied with the response. He searched online and purchased a book on how to interpret dreams. It should arrive in the mail next Thursday.

In the meantime he went to see a clairvoyant. She too said not to worry. Things you dream never happen. If you dream of something and it happens you’re a dead duck. Those were her exact words; you’re a goner if what you dream comes true; you’re dead; you might as well order your coffin.

Last night, Nolan dreamt that he’d ordered a book online about how to interpret dreams, and it would arrive in the mail next Thursday.