When Chadwick mowed the lawn in his bare feet his mother gave him a lecture:
I don’t know how many times I have told you to wear proper footwear when mowing the lawn. Your father’s cousin lost a finger while mowing the lawn by fiddling around with the grass-catcher while the lawn mower was still running. You don’t seem to realize just how dangerous these things are. You have also left a width of long grass over there by the gate. I wish you’d take more care and do things nicely. People can see our lawn from the road and goodness knows what they think when they see the haphazard way the lawn is mowed. You wouldn’t get a job as a caretaker at a sport’s field. Also I don’t know how many times I’ve told you to use the grass-catcher. This mowing the lawn without a catcher leaves grass clippings all over the place and I get grass on my slippers when I go over to the fence to tip the used ground coffee beans into the neighbour’s. The grass is impossible to get off simply by wiping shoes on the front door mat. I have to take my shoes off and remove the grass by hand. Now since you appear to have cut off all your toes I’d better get inside and make a phone call. I hope you realize the cost of an ambulance.
Weave a Web 