Willow was on to her fourth husband. Each of the first three had died around Christmas time. That was because marzipan icing on a Christmas cake has a strong enough taste to disguise any other ingredient that might lurk within.
Each husband had asked the same thing: “How come you’re not eating any Christmas cake?” Willow always replied that she didn’t like the taste of marzipan. It was too strong and sweet.
The fourth and current husband, Leo, had survived a good seven months of marriage. Unlike his predecessors he didn’t like marzipan. Leo had not told Willow of his distaste and so Willow had made a big Christmas cake with thick poisoned marzipan.
Leo didn’t want to offend Willow by not eating it after she had gone to so much trouble to make the cake look pretty, so he would discreetly pretend to eat while wrapping it carefully in a paper napkin for disposal.
All three of Willow’s prize pet chickens died, followed by the sudden death of Ms Sadie Walker, a neighbour on one side, who absolutely refused to accept any payment for services except perhaps a slice of delicious Christmas cake. Her death came as a shock to all: “I was just talking to her yesterday,” said Leo.
Then Ms Adeline Ackroyd, two doors up, passed into eternal bliss, followed by Ms Riley Crum from over the road and Ms Faith Swanson of North Dakota who was visiting for the last month or two the man who owned the corner shop.
It was then that Leo realized that the culprit was perhaps the Christmas cake. He didn’t say a word. It just so happened that Willow was partial to whipped cream-filled meringues. May she rest in peace.
Now that is a case of just desserts.
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It was the icing on the cake.
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I like it – a circular firing squad! The husband is going to be living in an empty neighborhood. Maybe a nice widow will move in.
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Most of the widows seemed to have been poisoned off.
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Leo didn’t knead a wife anyway…
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He had enough dough without kneading a wife.
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He is a little flakey but he is alright… he is finally alone, butter late than never.
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Perhaps she would have liked a whipped cream-filled merengue instead?
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She got her just desserts????
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Ha!
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She should have asked him whether he liked marzipan when she married him – she could then have tried a nice almond croissant on him.
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Ones preference for marzipan is definitely a question to ask in pre-matrimonial preparation.
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I don’t know about this one. Clearly the most appropriate way to poison a loved one at Christmas is with fruitcake.
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Turkey stuffing is an alternative.
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So many herbs to play with.
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If only Willow had known how to make Lutefisk.
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It sounds like a recipe for a lute playing mermaid.
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Pretty much.
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Revenge is sweet and creamy?
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