2450: Welcome to Verona

A roundish number and a solid fifty before getting to story 2500! So here is a true saga – as is the custom on such occasions. Some may regard this tale as “inappropriate”.

It was New Year’s Eve. I had been staying with a friend in Passau, Germany (once again trying to find my way back to New Zealand after studying in Massachusetts). The next leg of my journey was to be Italy. The train left Munich at 10 p.m. and would arrive in Verona early in the morning of New Year’s Day. As the train departed my friend presented me with two bottles of red wine – to celebrate the New Year.

I waved farewell. The train was on its way.  It was already New Year’s Day in New Zealand! I shall toast the New Year there. I had recently been in England. I shall toast the New Year there! I had visited Ireland. I shall toast the New Year there!  I had been in many countries all over Europe. Well! I was given two bottles to celebrate the New Year. The train arrived in Verona.  It was three in the morning. I left the empty bottles neatly in my carriage compartment.

Aha! There was a café in the station and it was open. I had exchanged some German money into Italian currency before I left Munich. I said to the lady behind the counter: “Coffee please”, and what did I get? One tiny cup with what looked like a teaspoon of molasses.  I noticed other customers “knocked it back” and went on their way. I hovered and listened how to order a decent mug of coffee. I was successful!

And then I wanted to go to the toilet. Urgently.  Number 2. But to get into a cubicle you had to pay with small coins and I didn’t have any.  I handed the guarding janitor a hefty note and he let me in.

Let me explain before I go any further…  I am not exactly a fashion model but it was midwinter and I dressed warmly. I wore jeans and boots. The jeans were held up by a pair of suspenders (we call them braces).  Over all of that I wore a pullover and a heavy coat, a scarf, and gloves. And – oh dear – the toilet was not sit-down but a beautifully tiled hole in the floor.

Let me get over this bit quite briefly… One can’t lower ones jeans without undoing the suspenders. One can’t undo the suspenders without taking off ones coat, scarf, and gloves. One cannot squat on the floor with pulled down jeans. One can’t take ones jeans off without first taking off ones boots. One doesn’t want to get ones socks wet on the bathroom tiles. To cut a long story short, there I was (ever so slightly inebriated) totally naked in a freezing toilet in Verona at three in the morning. I have no idea how Italians do it.

Emerging (fully clothed) back into the station I checked the train timetable. No train to take me out of this God-forsaken place. The train station was some distance from the centre of town. I decided to walk – in the dark – and arrived in Verona town centre at dawn.

What a marvellous place! I fell in love with it and I was sad a few days later to leave this wondrous town! I even saw the balcony where Juliet said, “O Romeo! Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?” It was magic and my real introduction to the entrancement that was Italy.

42 thoughts on “2450: Welcome to Verona

      1. Bruce Goodman Post author

        I must admit I like the personal touches in your own blog – e.g. where/when you were at such a time as a song was played etc. It makes it come alive. However, I take the point about potty matters.

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  1. noelleg44

    Bathrooms in Europe are hit and miss. Most of the ones we used sound like this one – the worst were the ones in the Tokyo airport years ago – just holes in the ground over which we squatted – tough to do when you have to take off stockings!

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  2. Yvonne

    You poor sod! Thank goodness you were young and supple and able to crouch over that hole in the floor.

    I am gratified to know that Italy wove its spell upon you, BA.

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          1. Badfinger (Max)

            That is fine Bruce…you get a pass whenever lol. I’m a little OCD about it with some….whoops that is politically incorrect!
            Oh I have an adventure to tell you!

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            1. Bruce Goodman Post author

              I am OCD but undiagnosed. It’s why I’m not a great reader – if I start a book I don’t do anything else. And I’m like a dog with a bone with everything else, e.g. the blog – which is why I want to finish at 2500 stories. I hope you are going to email the adventure – and fast!

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            2. Bruce Goodman Post author

              I am OCD but undiagnosed. It’s why I’m not a great reader – if I start a book I don’t do anything else. And I’m like a dog with a bone with everything else, e.g. the blog – which is why I want to finish at 2500 stories. I shall now read you adventure!

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          2. Badfinger (Max)

            Sorry…had ot do something…. Two weeks ago our preacher asked me if I could cover for him…last Sunday. I actually gave a sermon if you can believe that. On….. Political Correctness.
            You know he asked me to do a class before…I hated that because of the questions…I’m not an expert on the Bible whatsoever…but a sermon? I was drunk with power! I was in charge! I did link a verse with everything. Now the church ladys knows what a SJW, Snowflake, and Cancel Culture is…

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                  1. Badfinger (Max)

                    I’m sure he did! I really liked doing that. I could NOT do that every Sunday though. My heart is into this PC stuff…so I loved talking about it.

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                    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

                      You are lucky to have such a wonderful interest. Back in the 1980s I was obsessed with my first computer – a double floppy. I used to write these huge programmes in basic – mainly games I invented like Hangman, and putting air in a balloon without popping it. I loved all that. And I must admit that I still write most of the stuff on my computer in html and css! But now technology has started to leave me behind. And all web sites are starting to look the same. You can hardly right click now to edit a page’s source. You have to use THEIR program!

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                    2. Badfinger (Max)

                      Yea I made webpages out of txt files years ago but yea…technology has just went to quickly and I wanted to enjoy life instead of catching up….or…I was lazy!

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    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      First of all – she wasn’t on the balcony but standing down where Romeo should have been – but apparently it was the real Capulets’ house. And on the brass statue of Juliet’, her breasts were shiny – because “everyone” had patted them. No orchard.

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            1. Bruce Goodman Post author

              When I was at university in the early 1970s, Romeo and Juliet was banned because it was sexist. I’m amazed they have taken so long to have given such banning a name – “woke”. The Merchant of Venice and Othello were also banned.

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  3. umashankar

    The impossible floor-holed toilets (that also keep swinging both horizontally and vertically in unpredictable fits) are one of the reasons I hate overnight journeys in the country of my birth. Your ordeal reminded me of the torture I had to undergo in Kuala Lumpur airport where I had to brace a long queue to the hole.

    The breakthrough to the city of the romantic tale was a pleasant turn in the story. Here is wishing you a belated happy new year!

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    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Thank you Uma. I removed this posting and put it back today – as I thought it maybe wasn’t exactly a universal experience. The House of Montague and the House of Capulet – I’m not sure which was the “outhouse”.

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