Evelyne: Good morning class. Today we are going on a nature study walk. I want you to listen very carefully to what I say about every insect, bird, and plant that we see. When we get back to the classroom we will together make a list of names of the things we have seen – this will be a help with the spelling too. Once we have a list I want you to write a description of each thing that you saw. Perhaps you might even want to draw a picture. So we do this as soon as we get back. So let’s go!
Evelyne: Oh look children! Here’s a grasshopper. I wasn’t expecting to see something like this so soon. Danny and Jack down the back, pay attention. If you’re not going to listen you can go back to the classroom. This, as I said is a grasshopper. It is… yes Abram, what is it?
Abram: Excuse me Miss, but that’s a cicada. There are many differences between cicadas and Orthopterans, but the easiest way to tell them apart is Orthopterans have huge hind legs. So this is a cicada not a grasshopper.
Evelyne: Very good Abram. You obviously know your insects. This, children, is a weed called pink shamrock. We sometimes call it sourgrass because if you eat it it’s very sour. Here children, each of you can take a stem and if you bite into it, it will be sour.
Abram: It’s also called oxalis. We have to be careful Miss because you never know if the oxalis has been sprayed with Hydrocotyle weedkiller. So we should think twice before eating it, at least that’s what my father says.
Evelyne: Very good, Abram. Now here children right on the branch over there is a common house sparrow.
Abram: That’s not a house sparrow, Miss. That’s a hedge sparrow. They look a bit the same but the house sparrow is not as dainty as the hedge sparrow. It’s also called a Dunnock.
Evelyne: Thank you, Abram. Well, class, I think it’s time to go back to the classroom now and get out your Arithmetic books straightaway.
This takes me back to the good old days of teaching student nurses. I learned a lot from them!
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My cousin Leila was the Tutor Nurse at Hastings Memorial Hospital (NZ) for years (this was years ago) and in the end she resigned because she said you can’t fail a nurse after three years training – you have to tell them earlier that they are not cut out for it. She then got a huge job as the industrial nurse for Watties food manufacturers.
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She must be around my vintage; we still had state finals that had to be hurdled when i taught.
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Yes – around your vintage. If she was still alive she’d be 106!
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She’s just a touch more “vintager” than I am!!! 🙂
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Just watch she doesn’t pinch your walker – or your hearing aids – or your false teeth.
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Abram…I need to get the worksheets off my desk could you please run back and get them.
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It’s easier (and more PC) to say “Shut up, you snotty-nosed little know all”!
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🤣😂🤣
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Evelyne sounds like a real fount of wisdom.
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Yes – so many teachers are founts of wisdom.
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It’s an interesting one-act play. The lazy teacher and precocious disciple have shaped up well for a piece of such a short length.
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The world is riddled with both types of people! (“World” in the sense of “All the world’s a stage”).
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That Abran sure is a good storyteller.
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He didn’t let his teacher get away with making things up!
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Or was he the one making things up just to mess with the teacher? I might know a kid or two who would do that.
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Our genetic material is perfect!
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There’s always one Abram in every crowd.
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That is true – and as Noelle says in her comment they’re actually welcome!
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There’s one in every class, and I actually welcomed them if they were respectful. Abram was – I would have used him!
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You are exactly right – although some (though polite) can be a bit persistently intense!
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I think Abram will get his little ass kicked soon.
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Yes – he might get his donkey kicked and also his arse!
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I have to remember that…. ok…I’ll start using that term…over here it’s ass…yea the same as a donkey.
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