Max had just finished posting something on his blog when the phone rang. It was his landline. No one ever uses a landline these days, but Max had it just in case (as will one day inevitably happen) the Chinese blow the cell phone satellite and the earthbound transmitters to buggery. At least he’ll still be able to order pizza.
Who was on the phone? “Hello,” said Max. “Hello? Hello?”
There was no one on the other end. Sweet Fanny Adams.
Max reached for his wife’s handbag and took out her vintage M2 heavy machine gun. Aiming it at the landline telephonic communication instrument, Max pulled the trigger (with his bad finger) and blasted the phone to smithereens.
“I knew there was skulduggery afoot,” said Max. “No sooner had I realized that there was no one on the other end of the phone call than I realized there was indeed someone on the other end; listening. Listening to everything that was going on. It was the Chinese. And that’s why I shot it into oblivion with my wife’s vintage M2 heavy machine gun. I have rid myself of the Chinese spying on my IT work permanently.”
President Chi rubbed his hands in glee. Blowing up landlines was exactly what he wanted. They were harder to contol.
這正是醫生吩咐的, he said.
Amazing😊
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Thank you!
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Most welcome 🥳🥳🥳🥳
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I can’t win for losing… But that is alright…it did feel good to blow that phone into smithereens!
My life is complete…I made it now…immortalized in a Bruce Goodman story…Sweet Fanny Adams!
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Glad you didn’t miss it! You had suggested months ago to use “There is skulduggery afoot” in a story and I’ve only just caught up with it now!
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I LOVE that saying…it was worth the wait!
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Thanks Again Bruce
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Bruce must be twwin. Look what name he chose for today’s story!
Yvonne
Sent from Samsung tablet.
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A twin with who?
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That was supposed to go my niece. We were just discussing her grandson Max, but not on the landline!
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I thought your niece was about 25!
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She will be delighted at that. She is a tad younger than your honorable self.
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That makes tough old aunty good for coq o vin.
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What a nefarious plot!
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The plot thickens…
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If the phone was made in Japan, it would withstand the blows.
It it was made in China, a feather would have sufficed to complete the skulduggery.
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The voice of reason!
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The first thing that my brain begs to understand is how could an M2 machine gun fit into his wife’s handbag! On second thoughts though and after being enlightened by Google, Zhè zhèng shì yīshēng fēnfù de, Chinese may do better by sending the Wuhan Virus back in Time to infect a certain Alexander Graham Bell —it will save an awful lot of time and resources.
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Your flight of fantasy eclipses my hiding a M2 machine gun in a handbag! I can only concur with your thought that the Wuhan Fluan would better serve humankind by going back in time to AG Bell.
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A fine piece of whimsey – or maybe not!
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Thank you Noelle. As a writer of history you should know by now that I only write about the facts!!
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Wink, wink.
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My first thought was “What US state does this take place in?”
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Not far from Dumbarton Oaks I believe!
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How will he order pizza now?
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He lives next door to Pizza Hut apparently.
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Most places will take orders online now. Of course, the Chinese will probably know about it.
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I also want a pizza
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