2220. Helpful suggestions

Some have difficulty knowing how to word a death notice in the newspaper, so here are a few suggestions to help:

  • We are sad to announce that yesterday Olive Blanche passed from this life into the arms of Jesus.
  • Olive Blanche departed the earth and rests in peace.
  • The Grim Reaper came suddenly to Olive Blanche yesterday just after lunch.
  • Olive Blanche croaked yesterday after a hideously long and painful death.
  • Our Olive Blanche has at last kicked the bucket. Wear something bright for the funeral.
  • Olive Blanche has been on her last legs for some time, with one foot in the grave. She’s brushed with death before but this time has popped her clogs permanently and is about to push up daisies.
  • Yippee! Think of the money!

31 thoughts on “2220. Helpful suggestions

  1. observationblogger

    It would depend a lot on how I felt about the person as to which option I went with hehe.
    I have done two eulogies in my life at church. I didn’t hear the beloved turn in their coffins throughout, which was a relief.
    I imagine you have done your fair share of funerals Bruce!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Yes I have done a few funerals but wouldn’t know how many – including my father’s. I missed my mother’s funeral because I was overseas and her last words were that I wasn’t to waste money coming to NZ!

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
      1. observationblogger

        Anyhow how are you doing Bruce? I read that NZ had a little teeny COVID surge and all hell is broken loose like in AUS regarding lockdowns and what have you. Modern day life seems ruled by COVID and lockdowns. Quite otherworldly.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply
        1. Bruce Goodman Post author

          Yes – we’re all in lockdown. I think COVID might have taken a hold here. One of the 25 struck with it yesterday had just come home from a school dance with 500 others!

          Like

          Reply
          1. observationblogger

            Ouch. I don’t get the histeria to be honest and I live in one of the countries biggest hit by it. OK, it’s a newish Pandemic and killing people and anywhere on the scale of the Spanish Flu, but does everyone have to give up living their regular lives for this? And the untold lives affected by curtailing the economy operating as normal. It’s obscene how all individuals are being coalesced into being something out of a brave new world chapter.

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
              1. observationblogger

                i meant to say not any where near the scale of the Spanish flu. But I gathered you understood that…. Western society based on meritocracy and rule of law (and divinity of the individual axiom) is getting beat to a pulp and rather quickly much faster than the Roman empire fell.

                Liked by 1 person

                Reply
      1. badfinger20 (Max)

        I saw a picture of a tombstone that actually had that…no photoshop tricks…it was real.
        But yes Bruce we are both sick…and we take some pride in that. It takes all kinds.

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

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