2159. Slugs

When Leanna flushed her recently departed husband’s medication down the toilet, little did she realize the consequences.

Randolph had been on eleven pills in the morning and five in the evening. Leanna had read somewhere that leftover pills should be returned to the pharmacy for destruction, but post-funeral tidy-ups are busy times so she simply flushed the pills down the toilet.

The combination of chemicals had a remarkable effect on some of the bugs living in the sewer. It took a while, but one day two gigantic slugs slithered their way up the porcelain toilet bowl and began devouring the wooden seat. The slithery slugs were at least two feet long. Veronica had opened the bathroom door, screamed, and slammed the door shut.

The slugs (by now there were a whole family perhaps twenty or thirty) began to eat the wooden bathroom door. Three slugs flattened themselves out and slithered under the door. Instantly they began to devour the passageway carpet.

Leanna was practical. She got an aerosol can of fly spray that she kept under the kitchen sink. Daring to approach one of the carpet-eating slugs, she sprayed so that white foam covered the entire slug. It squirmed about a bit and died. Instantly two slugs began devouring the dead slug. They seemed to grow several inches. They loved it!

By now there was a substantial hole in the bathroom door. Forty or fifty slugs slithered into the passage way and slimed their way in all directions through the house. Leanna phoned emergency services. A snake is one thing. Rats another. But giant slugs? Yeah, right. Don’t both us again lady.

No one came to help. No one, no one, no one. Leanna got in her car and drove the fourteen miles to her sister’s place. She did not know that two slugs had already lodged themselves beneath her car.

Over time the slugs spread. They have learnt to be more deceptive. They hide beneath all sorts of things. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if a whole family is living under your bed.

47 thoughts on “2159. Slugs

        1. Bruce Goodman Post author

          I once climbed a very high hill – opposite our house – I’d send you a photo if I knew how. Way way up in the mountain (I was all of 12) I turned over a rock in a creek and there were two freshwater crayfish. And then I heard (God knows from where) two huge orchestral chords. And I went down the hill and always want to compose those chords. So that’s where I am still now!

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                1. Bruce Goodman Post author

                  Not really. The nearest would be playing keyboard in make-shift bands for musicals like Joseph and the Amazing etc… and Godspell and so on. I am no good without the music. I have to read the music and can’t even learn to play anything off by heart!

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                    1. badfinger20 (Max)

                      This is totally facsinating. I envy your skills on reading music….I play completely by ear.
                      So when you write a piece….can you play it the next day without sheet music?

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                    2. Bruce Goodman Post author

                      I can never play it without the music! I couldn’t play Mary had a little lamb or Twinkle twinkle little star without the music!! I envy those who can play by ear.

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                    3. Bruce Goodman Post author

                      I’ve just realized that there was a video attached to your comment the other day – so I’ve had my wires crossed. The Beatles I want to tell you. It’s fantastic. I didn’t know it at all. I love wrong notes and this is one to savour. Often people don’t realize that things aren’t necessarily tunes but percussion. The piano for e.g. is often used as a percussion instrument (I reckon). Here in the Beatles the saving grace is the rhythm. Fantastic!

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                    4. badfinger20 (Max)

                      Those notes are off but in a good way. That is what your 2nd piece…just in that spot reminded me of….it gets your attention.
                      By the way….have you ever done film music? Or anything to film?

                      Liked by 1 person

                    5. Bruce Goodman Post author

                      About 40 years ago I was asked to write music for a short film and forgot. When they turned up to record it at the school where I was teaching I hadn’t given it a thought. The film was set in the forest so I grabbed a kid who played the flute and he and I made bird noises. The film crew were over the moon!

                      Liked by 1 person

                    6. badfinger20 (Max)

                      If that would have happened….we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation lol. You would be in demand…if it’s true…that would be an extreme honor!

                      Liked by 1 person

  1. arlingwoman

    This is a horror story. I like it, like Day of the Triffids or some such. Have you ever seen the aftermath of a slugfest? It’s a big, shiny silvery agglomeration of circular paths crisscrossing on a sidewalk. I can only assume it was a party.

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  2. Sarah Angleton

    I just want you to know that I am reading this in bed at 11 pm the night before I have a very early morning. In fact, I should have been asleep a while ago, but now I have to stay up later so that I can surround my bed with dishes of beer for drowning the slugs that will surely haunt my dreams. Thanks for that.

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