1959. A finger in every pie

Wendy and Ronald didn’t eat out that often. Now and again they might go to a fast-food chain and get something. Not to take home, but to simply have there and then on one of the outside, bird-crapped tables. But still, an outing is an outing. It’s a change of scene if not exactly dining at the Ritz.

They normally liked to eat healthy. They were not fuss-pots about food but I suppose they could be called “careful eaters”. Healthy eating meant that going to get an unhealthy meat pie or an unhealthy hamburger and French fries once in a while was an absolute treat!

It was while Ronald was tucking onto his kangaroo and double egg burger that he came across a finger; a human finger. Although he wasn’t sure because he had already bitten into it and therefore pulled the finger out of his mouth, he was ninety percent sure that the finger had been stuck in the kangaroo meat rissole.

“Look what I found in my hamburger!” exclaimed Ronald to Wendy. “Someone’s index finger!”

“It’s not an index finger,” said Wendy. “I think it’s a middle finger.”

“How would you know that?” said Ronald. “They’re both very much the same.”

A wee argument ensued, with both Wendy and Robert sticking to their guns; although Wendy reckoned it was from a right hand and Ronald from a left. In the end they were able to laugh about it.

“It’s an unresolved mystery,” said Ronald as he scrapped his leftover meal with the uneaten finger into the waste bin. “I guess it’s something we will never solve.”

Which just goes to show, if a moral is to be taken from this episode, that wee matrimonial disagreements can sometimes be solved with a little laughter.

23 thoughts on “1959. A finger in every pie

    1. Bruce Post author

      Although that’s true I cannot help but feel left out that no one has ever done anything whereby I might sue and get rich and get a house and grow tomatoes and okra and stuff.

      Liked by 3 people

  1. arlingwoman

    Oh, my. Bruce, I do NOT think anyone finding a finger in their burger would just chuck it in and leave. But then again, I live in a country where a COVID infected president knowingly went to a fundraiser of people his own age and asked staff not to reveal their positive test results…so who knows how skewed my judgement could be!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. disorderlyjottings

    In one of the most celebrated cases in UK tort law a snail was found in a bottle of ginger beer (Donoghue v Stevenson). The one entirely doubtful fact was whether there actually was a snail. Was there really a finger in the patty or are you spinning us a yarn?

    Liked by 1 person


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