Pieter had an obsession with wild game. He had tried to eat as many legitimate wild things as possible. He not only hunted them, just one of every variety, but he thoroughly researched the best possible way to cook them. What was the best way to prepare wild pork, for example? Did one devour it with an accompanying apple sauce or perhaps wild blueberry chutney?
His list of tasty wild creatures was comprehensive. His favourite game taste at present stood at wild turkey, although the drumsticks of a wild turkey were quite stringy and tough. It must be because of all the running and scratching these wild birds do. But it was far tastier than the domestic turkey and quite different. People don’t realize.
Of course, although it was legitimate to hunt some things Pieter stopped at having grilled bat. One never quite knew what dingy guano-riddled cave the bats had been in. Besides, Chinese cooking wasn’t Pieter’s favourite form of culinary delight.
Although wild moose meat was good enough there was an awful lot of it. A single animal filled Pieter’s freezer. His wife wouldn’t touch moose – “too gamey” – so Pieter spent months ploughing through the moose carcass. He was not one to waste things, but by the end of it he was totally sick of elk.
There were two creatures on Pieter’s list that he had never tried: wild hare and wild swan. Where he lived one could hunt swan, although numbers hunted by each hunter was limited. Still, one needed only the one to try it. And then Lady Luck stepped in!
A friend gave Pieter a hare and a swan on the same day. The same day! Pieter was ecstatic. “When shall we eat them?” asked Pieter’s wife. Pieter knew exactly what they would do:
HARE TODAY, SWAN TOMORROW.
Ah, I love that punchline at the end. Great story!
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Ha! Thanks Lucy. Much appreciated!
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Groan. Too bad you can’t see our faces as we hit that final line.
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It would be like an angel looking upon the face of God – at least that is what I think you mean.
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Oh BA, you always get it right.
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🙂
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Is this an obscure reference to Little Bunny Foo Foo or am I being super dumb?
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You’re being exquisitely clever – although I don’t know who Foo Foo is! And you should know by now – I’m nearly always obscure(d).
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Aha! A quick Google and I see an anonymous personage pinched half of my final line. The price of fame…
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God I can’t shut up today – just realized in my egocentricity that the English expression is: Here today, gone tomorrow. But I presumed everyone knew it!
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Lolz.
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This was inspired by a blog with which (I would imagine) you are relatively familiar!
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I have no idea.
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That’s one of your strong points.
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Thanks.
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This was an awesome story on a rough-ish day. I wish I had thought of it. Little Bunny Foo-Foo is a children’s song here that my daughter had to learn in speech class to help her say her letter “F”.
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Yes – thinking of you these days Herb. I had trouble with the letter S as a kid and would use an F instead – hence I had a sister Suzanne I called FuFanne.
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Thank you so much. And I had never heard the song before. She had suffered a lot ear infections as a baby and couldn’t hear for a while. The speech teachers really did an incredible job with her.
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I appreciate the industry with which the author and the hero worked to arrive at the final line.
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Thanks Uma. Going through a long day here – as the dog has had 5 epileptic fits in the last 15 hours. Now I’m a mess! and appreciated the warmth of your comment!
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I am sorry about your dog. Hope he recovers soon.
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One of the longest routes to a punchline in blogging history.
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Thanks. I try to be verbose!
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Mission accomplished!
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Here all swans technically belong to the queen and it was considered treason to eat one until 1998! Now they’re a protected species so you still can’t kill or eat them.
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Over here the wild swans are the black ones, which are not as pretty and graceful as the white ones.
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