How wonderful! Rafferty (known to his friends as Raff) belonged to the Spiggyholes Ornithologist Society. Like most bird-watchers he was consumed by a passion for observing birds. Every Saturday, sunshine or not, he would disappear into the environment with camera and binoculars.
It was on one of these Saturday excursions that Raff spied a pair of Condove Variegated Flicktails (Australissimus flickbumibus). These birds were native to a neighbouring continent and had never been seen in this country before. When I say “neighbouring”, the continent and Raff’s country were separated by a sea of hundreds of miles. The pair of Condove Variegated Flicktails (Australissimus flickbumibus) had clearly been caught in a massive storm and been blown across the ocean. It was not a migratory bird. Such a thing happened only once or twice in a century or so. If the storm-blown birds settled and reproduced they would be classified as “native” to the country because they were not introduced by humans.
Raff’s excitement knew no bounds. The Condove Variegated Flicktail (Australissimus flickbumibus) was by no means a boring bird, unlike most of the native species of his country. The native species were all black or dark grey or dark brown or dark green. Quite dreary really! Whereas the Condove Variegated Flicktails (Australissimus flickbumibus) were a bright and colourful addition to the native fauna. Let’s hope they breed.
And sing! My word! Could the Condove Variegated Flicktails (Australissimus flickbumibus) sing or what?
Raff wrote an article (complete with photographs) for the Ornithological Bulletin, a monthly magazine dedicated to the promotion of native species of birds. What a furore the article caused! Half the readers were thrilled with such a colourful and musical possible permanent settler. The rest of the readers were dismayed. The new species would undermine the habitat of the native Leaden Brown Muted Caw-caw bird (Boringdullnus dozimus).
That’s why a representative was sent by the Government’s Ministry of the Environment to shoot the Condove Variegated Flicktails (Australissimus flickbumibus) dead.
Weave a Web 
It’s funny that you don’t talk about the Dacelo novaeguineae massacre or the terrible fate that befell the Platycercus elegans; it shows your true colors as a propagandist for the GME.
LikeLiked by 4 people
The reason in fact that I’m not a propagandist for Granulomatous meningo-encephalomyelitis (GME) is because it’s not a bird; unlike the Dacelo novaeguineae and the Platycercus elegans; – both of which are delicious eating.
LikeLiked by 2 people
How dare you?! I’m contacting Greenpeace as we speak. Prepare yourself for your existence to be boycotted.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Greenpeace people are my friends. I was the one who let them have half of the last hard-boiled dodo’s egg to try. We also shared info as to whether the endangered Jumpy Kangaroo was better boiled or roasted.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Steamed, Bruce. It’s better steamed.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’ll try that next time one bounces my way.
LikeLiked by 2 people
If you see something keep it to yourself.
LikeLiked by 4 people
But how would we become famous? The two birds pictured are New Zealand fantails that flit around your head when you go outside. Last week an albino one made an appearance. Crowds are flocking with their phones – swarms of them.
LikeLiked by 3 people
The birds were super excited when they saw the first people with cellphones. Their scientific community went bananas trying to figure out the anomoly. ( And yes, I know I am ignoring your question. I don’t know how to answer it, so I’m pretending you never asked. Thanks.)
LikeLiked by 2 people
I have that trouble all the time (not knowing how to answer) so I’ve developed this habit of saying anything stupid.
LikeLiked by 2 people
That’s my favorite thing to say.
LikeLiked by 2 people
When I come to visit you, I will smuggle a breeding pair of the Aussie fantails in my luggage. Will you promise to keep them safe and ensure they establish a big colony of these lovely birds at your farm?
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yes! And bring a couple of platypus eggs as well.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ah, Bruce, the story was a fine one and the comments were its continuation!!!
LikeLiked by 2 people
The comments are always the best part of any story!
LikeLiked by 2 people
That is what happens when ostentatious ornithologists decide to play god. The distinct scientific names of the birds tell a story of their own.
LikeLiked by 2 people
It strikes me that “ostentatious ornithologists” play god by trying to control evolution.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aye, my lord.
LikeLiked by 2 people
It’s sad when politics has to get involved.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And it happens more and more!
LikeLiked by 1 person
On a serious note, I find it uncomfortable when conservationists start talking about natives and non natives when it means killing off the ‘invaders’. I can understand the arguments, like our red squirrels being out-competed by those naughty grey squirrels from overseas, but it still makes me uncomfortable, where is the line?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes – the story was inspired by a pair of very colourful Australian doves that got blown to New Zealand in a storm. They had introduced themselves! And they were exterminated.
LikeLiked by 1 person