It had been an inconvenience. Owing to the huge amount of looting going on during the week that the government banned all cigarettes – just for the week mind you – it was dangerous to venture outside from early dusk to late dawn. “Stay inside” was the government’s cry. It was both a command and a warning. Those seen venturing out after six in the evening would be shot.
The curfew had at least one good thing coming out of it; there were no traffic accidents between dusk and dawn. For the whole week there were no deaths on the roads. Those whose lives had been spared because of the curfew naturally had no idea that their lives had been spared. If there had been no curfew they would be dead.
Of course, being a writer gives one a bird’s-eye view. We know who was spared and who was not. I’m telling you now: Elwin Frisby was spared. He had sat at home in a bad mood. Here he was nineteen years old, and locked up at his parents’ home on a Saturday night. A Saturday night! What a difference it may have made to his mood if he had been able to be told that if it wasn’t for the curfew he would be in a body bag lying on a shelf in a morgue somewhere.
There are other things we writers glean from our bird’s-eye view. Elwin Frisby eventually married Anita and they had three children. One of them was Cornelius. Cornelius became the greatest tyrant in the history of the country. Thousands died at his hand. He was a raging megalomaniac.
How much better it would have been if years earlier there had been no curfew and his father had been killed off in a car accident. But who was to know?
Alas, there are always unintended consequences. By the way, have you read Ian McEwan’s novel Nutshell? I finished it recently and thought of you. It’s written entirely from the point of view of a late term fetus. Seems like just your kind of wonderfully absurd story.
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Thank you for the reading recommendation Sarah. I shall seek it out. I don’t recall myself being a late term fetus. Perhaps I missed that bit out!
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Well, I suppose you were at one point.
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I’m glad you brought my attention to the fact that cigerattes are going to be banned soon. In the interim I plan on investing heavily in the black market for cigarettes, so that by the time Cornelius comes to power I will be sitting pretty on a pile of gold in my bat cave, and won’t give two flying flips about the millions he kills.
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I wish I’d have thought of that. Sometimes you are suspiciously smart.
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He gets it out of a book (probably).
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Out of a what?
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A flying flip is nothing for an acrobatic bat. If you have a supply of black market smokes I’m moving to Wisconsin.
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Funny story, the town I live in used to be a major tobacco center. I walk my dog past the old tobacco warehouses almost every day. Nowadays marijuana is probably more popular, but there’s certainly potential.
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I used to smoke 40 a day, until my car broke down and I was stuck way out of town. I smoked every cigarette butt I could find – even resorted to pine needles!
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Youch! That’s a pretty serious habit. How were the pine needles? I have never taken up smoking because I’m too cheap, but if I could get the same effect from raking my lawn I might be sorely tempted.
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Alas! But who WAS in that body bag?
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I believe it may have been Gretchen Whitmer.
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Feel free to join me in the bat cave bro.
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How many bats are shitting in that cave?
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I don’t know, I already ate them.
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Ha!
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This is an experiment
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An entertaining story with a refreshing technique. Metafiction is not only a crucial ingredient of the plot, it assumes the persona of the protagonist.
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I’m not sure if it’s the same thing as metafiction but I’ve always been a bit partial to Bertolt Brecht’s “Verfremdungseffekt” – which reminds the audience that they’re watching a play. It has the opposite effect of dragging the audience into the action.
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I need to do some catching up, Bruce.
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Ha! If I sound erudite it’s because we had to study Brecht at school (53 years ago!)
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You don’t. You are a blessing to your readers. Something fresh in the morning.
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That’s why cigarettes shouldn’t be banned, even for a week.
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You make a good case for smoking.
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Wow, the twists in this piece really are fantastic. My mind was working overtime after reading this. Thanks for the post.
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Thanks so much for your comment. Delighted to have you aboard!
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