1691. Hershel’s busy month

Hershel was an undertaker, and he thought it strange that of the fifty bodies he’d dealt with that month twenty-seven of them were called John. Usually there were only a couple of deaths per month in his area, although it went up a little in the depths of winter. One month he once got six bodies, two of whom were Michael. But now in one month fifty bodies! And twenty-seven called John? Goodness me!

To make matters even weirder, of the fifty deaths twenty-two of them were female and therefore would probably never be called John. That meant that twenty-seven out of twenty-eight males were called John. The sole non-John was called Hector.

Further pondering produced other startling results. Of the twenty-seven Johns, twenty-six of them had the surname of Smith. Twenty-six John Smiths in one month! The only John who didn’t have the surname of Smith was John Gillespie-Fotheringham. That must surely be some sort of record.

The experts mulled over how such a thing could happen. It was a mystery. And then the reason was pointed out. Sometimes some things in life are so obvious. It was staring everyone in the face. John Gillespie-Fotheringham was a clerical error. There were twenty-seven John Smiths after all. What a relief!

15 thoughts on “1691. Hershel’s busy month

  1. Nitin Lalit

    Ha ha. This is a mind bender of a piece. Such a surreal spoof! I love how the experts overlooked the true mystery and sighed with relief over there being twenty-seven John Smiths! 😂 I’m still laughing! Well done Bruce!

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      That’s true. Names don’t greatly matter, My mother would often start with the name of the oldest child and work her way down until she hit my name at number 5. I guess she was addressing a person and not a collection of syllables.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

Please feel free to spout, tout, flout, sprout, pout, or simply say something sensible