Meredith Scantlebury wasn’t simply horribly nasty; she was horrible AND nasty. Whenever there was a Pot Luck luncheon for those in the Stitch and Bitch Knitters’ Guild for example, Meredith would furtively go from dish to dish and drop in something yucky. That way she ensured that everyone else had a horrible-tasting dish, and her contributing dish was simply terrific.
Once she tipped half a bottle of Tabasco Sauce into Angelica Merklebach’s sliced almond fruit cake. Another time she stirred half a cup of kitchen detergent into Frederica Swingenhammer’s creamed corn. The deviancy went on and on.
After several pot luck dinners had come and gone people began to realize that Meredith’s dishes were the only dishes that were edible. Perhaps she had something to do with the inedibility of everyone else’s contributions?
Angelica and Frederica took things into their own hands. When Meredith loudly, ostentatiously, and triumphantly removed the lid from the silver platter holding her delectable sweetbreads, they were crawling with maggots. Maggots!
All of the knitters of the Stitch and Bitch Knitters’ Guild gathered around and roared with laughter. Meredith stormed out and was never heard of again. Her left-behind silver platter was donated to the local theatre. It was filled with kitty litter and the theatre cat used it as the need arose.
Stitch and Bitch. That’s a keeper.
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I have to be honest and say that I read “Stitch and Bitch” knitters club somewhere.
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So, that is how the Witch of Stitch and Bitch was ostracised. Mercifully, the author has spared us the grisly details of her demise.
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Her demise is in the works (probably).
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I can’t decide which is more gross–the original sweetbreads or the added maggots!
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I used sweetbreads because quite a few people (I would imagine) don’t know what they are!
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The story could make a good drama if it was adapted by that local theatre.
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Yes – they would already have the silver dish as a prop!
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Exactly. Cultural life would blossom.
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A fabulous comeuppance for Meredith, the cat litter is a particularly nice touch!
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Thanks. I was rather taken by the kitty litter.
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