Warren had one regret in life: he wanted to be called to jury service. All his friends, at some time in their lives, had been called up. Names were selected at random (apparently) from electoral rolls. Warren felt deep down that his time would come.
He didn’t want to sit on a jury that tried piffling little nothings. There’s nothing interesting about a woman called Mabel sneaking cannabis tucked in her pantyhose into a prison. There’s nothing interesting about a twenty-year old five-fingered discount personage called Norman swiping vacuum cleaner bags from a two dollar shop.
No! Warren wanted to sit on a jury that tried murder, and not just any murder, but a murder trial that went on for weeks. Something complex, with lots of intrigue and blood. That would certainly add a spice to his life.
Such an invitation to possibly spice up his life came last Thursday. Warren nonchalantly, almost absent-mindedly, went out to his mail box on the side of the road. There was a letter for him with a logo at the top that he did not recognize. Yes! He was summoned to jury service! He should make an appearance in court next week. Goodness! At last! At last!
So as we come to bury Warren today let us remember that he saw that his lifelong ambition was about to be fulfilled: jury service. This fulfilment was the last thing he saw before being hit by a passing car as he stood too far out on the road engrossed in reading his mail.
Weave a Web 
Oh dear! I didn’t see that coming. Kind of like Norman.
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I meant Warren. Had a brain fart whilst typing.
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Warren. Norman. They’re all the same – these fictional characters have little personality!
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Oh, Warren rings true. I have a friend who is a murder trial junkie. She’d go sit in court whenever there was a murder trial.
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I’ve only been to court once (to watch) and the case was most innocuous,
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I’ve served on two juries. One was for leaving the scene of an accident and the other was assault on a police officer.
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I hope you gave the b*****ds the death penalty!
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That wasn’t on the table, but both were found guilty. I even served as the foreman for the hit and run. Very interesting level in group dynamics.
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I’ve never been picked for jury – not even rejected in the selection process.
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I didn’t receive a summons for years, then all of a sudden I was a frequent flyer.
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Love a bit of irony!
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Nothing like irony to iron the creases out…
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!! 😃
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Nananoyz, I have heard that called ‘intellectual irregularity’. Poor Warren.
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That’ll teach him for having such a handsome letterbox. Do you say letterbox or mailbox? I’ve lived in so many places that I’m starting to get muddled with names.
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He does ineed have a splendid mailbox, and with a pretty blossom to complement the scene. I wonder what sort of mail might arrive in the next few days? 😊
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The pretty flower is a dahlia – now died down for the winter. I love getting mail. I am currently vacuuming but keep stopping and having another cup of tea because I expect the mail lady to drive past any minute.
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I loved the elegant manner in which the climax was introduced. I was so captivated by the unfolding story, the car could have easily mowed me down too —I could almost hear and feel the Wham, Bang, Clang, Whoosh out of the blue!!! Incidentally, was it the author himself driving that car?
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No – the author was actually mowing the lawn around the letterbox and nearly got hit, so engrossed was he in the beautification process.
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There is an autobiographical streak somewhere in the story.
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The autobiographical streak is that I think these days as I go out to check if there’s any mail, that I hope I get called for jury service. You get paid $17 an hour (apparently) which is not much, but it’s $17 more than I’m getting at the moment!!
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You will make for a wonderful Judge. Here is wishing you zillion jury assignments!
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Thank you! They say it can be deathly boring – being on a jury.
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It is. And then you’re scared the accused will reme6ber you and get even.
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Eek! I feel a plot coming on!
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You’re welcome.
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Mailed it!
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I knew you’d come up with the worst pun this side of the Mississippi!
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Careful haha
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The man died happy. Who can ask for more? 😉
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I guess when you’re run over by a car one is hardly in a position to want for more!
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Well at least he died happy…I’ve done jury service but it wasn’t even as exciting as cannabis in pantyhose….
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How awful to be lumber by run-of-the-mill jury service. I suspect it always is!
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The hours of waiting are the worst, stuck in a room waiting to see if you’ll be chosen…
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I had a friend who would wear a prolife badge to the selection room so getting selected was always out of the question.
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Somehow, I saw that coming! I have been called three times and never served. Once, because I was out of the country, and twice because I have a son in the military, my grandfather was a cop and I am too educated to be a ‘peer’ of the accused. Go figure.
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I am completely unloved when it comes to jury service. My father got fined 5 shillings in 1923 for riding his bicycle at night without a light. Is that enough to exclude me from jury service?
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Really? I don’t think so!
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