Stella had rather foolishly invited the neighbours, Mr and Mrs Jones, over for dinner. She had quite forgotten that there was no housekeeping money left in the kitty for the rest of the week. To put it bluntly, she was right out of cash and there was nothing in the freezer.
“What a stupid thing to do! What a stupid thing to do!” muttered Stella for the whole week. Somehow she was half waiting for a miracle – like by the time Friday came food would rather miraculously have fallen from the sky. One could hardly feed dinner guests on a slice of bread and a raw carrot and celery – which was all that was left. And then the miracle happened!
A rabbit!
A wild rabbit came hopping by just as Stella was emptying the tea pot of its leaves around the lemon tree. Swiftly she hit the rabbit on the head with the tea pot. It was dazed. Practical Stella wrung its neck, and with considerable joy she skinned and gutted it.
Rabbit stew! No one in the world could make rabbit stew as delicious as Stella. And Mr and Mrs Jones agreed.
“That was the most delicious rabbit I have ever tasted in my life,” said Mr Jones.
“Talk of coincidence,” laughed Mrs Jones. “It seems to be rabbit week. Our little daughter’s pet rabbit, Fluffy Balls, escaped and went missing earlier this very week.”
Oh, Bruce. You killed a bunny. 😦
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And with a tea pot – don’t you just love it!
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No!
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They’re a pest. There are at least 20 around my house and they’re eating my lettuces at night.
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Okay, enjoy your rabbit stew. With a lettuce side salad.
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Nice of the early Brits to bring bunnies with them, eh?
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And the Australian possum – another pest!
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Mmm, Fluffy Balls. That’s what we call my new cat Garfield. Also Fluffy Butt and Peck’s Bad Boy.
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I hope you’re not intending to have him for dinner!
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Ha, ha – needs must!
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Thank goodness it wasn’t a pet rat!
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Best story title in the history of the world. (And keep your teapot away from my Chihuahua!)
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There’s no meat on a Chihuahua (unless the last one I had in a stew was a bit skinny).
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It’s a bad idea to mess with your lettuces —the claws of your stories can reach the farthest corners of the universe, and stories beget ideas, desires, deviousness, and importantly, succulent recipes.
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You make me want to slice my lettuce in future with a great deal more care!
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Oh, dear. Could have been worse – we have ‘Sandy Balls’ near us
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I hope Sandy B doesn’t end up in your renovated kitchen.
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🙂
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The nearby pub,The Fighting Cocks, has the monopoly
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My ggg-grandfather had a cock fighting pit in his pub in Cornwall – for which he was fined!
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At least she wasnt a bunny boiler
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Nothing worse – hell knows no fury like a woman scorned!
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I’m glad you lettuce share your funny story.
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At least the Jones’ were polite enough to eat the rabbit before they mentioned the missing bunny. 🙂
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I am partial to the occasional rabbit – over here in New Zealand they are not sold in stores (don’t know why) so can only have wild ones.
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So nice to read of the demise of various rabbits…
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I saw a rabbit bobbying along outside my window just this morning.
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Gaaaa… after your lettuces!!!!
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My lettuces haven’t germinated yet! But the spinach is just starting and the corn salad (mache) is well on the way! Thank you for the Bohemian Coffee Cake recipe – I shall possibly try it tomorrow! The conversions are perfect! (I have a set of American measuring cups, spoons, for when I do American recipes!)
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