1113. News from Hickton-in-Sticks

It’s been a month now, perhaps six weeks, since the town of Hickton-in-Sticks got broadband. Mrs Myrtle Beech said it was a great disappointment. She had waited months, even years, to start a blog and thus far nothing had gone viral.

“Nothing has gone viral,” said Myrtle. “The whole thing’s a scam.”

Mr Bristol Port agreed.

“I’d looked forward to broadband excitedly,” said Bristol. “But once you’ve seen one porn site you’ve seen the lot. In fact I get a great deal more satisfaction looking into the mirror. It’s blown way out of proportion.”

Ms Savannah Field thought the whole thing was marvellous. She was the town’s school teacher and the online computer games at least got the kids off their phones.

“It’s great for me as a teacher,” said Savannah. “The kids log on first thing in the morning and by the end of the day they’re reluctant to go home. Computer games are certainly a great boon for a teacher, and getting broadband in Hickton-in-Sticks has improved the quality of education the kids are getting.”

“It’s a scam,” said Myrtle.

“It’s blown out of proportion,” said Bristol.

“Put it this way,” said Savannah. “Things have changed for the better since we’ve got broadband. In the last month only five people from Hickton-in-Sticks have committed suicide.”

10 thoughts on “1113. News from Hickton-in-Sticks

      1. chrisnelson61

        Years ago the entire country used to ‘close’ for a fortnight at the end of July/ beginning of August (factories holidays) and I think that many people still retain this mentality: of to one of the Costa’s (Spain, not the coffee shop) for two weeks Sun. Normal service will resume shortly.
        British Summer to a tee here: rain, Sun, rain, cloud, Sun. The other day we had a hail storm! All the best to you.

        Liked by 1 person

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  1. umashankar

    This one is Dickensian in tone but the twist is very Goodmanish. Needless to say it made me smile. The aphoristic closure is a saga unto itself. The part about the mirror gone out of proportions is a brilliant stroke. It is interesting how sexual fantasies can keep even suicidal folks away from the Grim Reaper except when fascinations to meet him live on Facebook grips them. The name of the place is special too. Lastly, it is a proof that humans remain the same everywhere.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      !!! That’s ok – I deleted your comment intended for another site – although it whet my curiosity! And I shall delete this one a little later, as it doesn’t stand on its own particularly well. There’s a story (for you, for me) in the confusing of comments on blogs!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

Gentle thoughts and expressions of astoundedness are both gratefully accepted.

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