Poem 25: It would be awful

25poem

It would be awful to die on a Saturday.
There’s always sport on tele and
probably the mortician and her husband have gone to the races.

It would be awful to die on a Sunday.
Half the shops are shut and
probably the undertaker’s taken the day off and gone off.

It would be awful to die on a Monday.
The week’s just waking up and
probably the embalmer had to dash to town for more eye shadow.

It would be awful to die on a Tuesday.
It’s such a humdrum sort of day and
probably the sexton’s busy burying the crowd that croaked over the weekend.

It would be awful to die on a Wednesday.
It’s slap-bang midweek and
probably the hearse is out of action with a flat tire or a burned-out clutch.

It would be awful to die on a Thursday.
We always get take-a-ways then and
probably the morgue is chockablock with yesterday’s bodies.

It would be awful to die on a Friday.
It’s the day before the weekend and
probably the resident organist is having a few drinks to celebrate a profitable week.

As you can see, no day’s good for dying,
which is probably why I’m not that much looking forward to it.

33 thoughts on “Poem 25: It would be awful

    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Ah – think Italy and you’ll be ok… I had walked all day in Florence and had blisters and was freezing. I went into a church and sat to rest on a tombstone. It was Galileo’s tomb I discovered, and across from it was Rossini’s. And next to that Michelangelo’s. Try finding all that in our little worlds!

      Liked by 3 people

      Reply
      1. Yvonne

        I’ll drop into Santa Croce and dust off Galileo’s tomb, and tell him you appreciated having that rest.

        Yes, imagine all those famous dudes resting so close to one another, and they never met in life.

        Liked by 2 people

        Reply
        1. Bruce Goodman Post author

          I never knew the name of the place before. Sitting on such a tombstone was a total fluke – I was the only one walking around Florence in the coldest ice storm in 50 years or something. This was years ago. I remember (I think) there was a statue of Dante outside?

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          Reply
          1. Yvonne

            I’m proud of you for recalling some of the famous fellows who have funerary monuments there. I wonder what day of the week they died? I’ll try to see if there is a statue of Dante, I can’t remember that detail.

            How is the new abode going?

            Liked by 1 person

            Reply
            1. Bruce Goodman Post author

              The new abode is fine – but rain rain rain and freezing cold. Two days ago we had snow! In January! The temperature inside sits around 14°C – and we’re too proud to light the fire. It’s summer!

              Liked by 1 person

              Reply
  1. umashankar

    Humour darker than the dark matter that pulsates in the nada beyond. Is there a mockery of which I get a whiff of? I loved the beatific conclusion, though that too has been marinated in irony. Amen, Bruce!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Thanks Uma. I had to post this else I would waste a month on making it only minusculey better. I would love to be “marinated in irony”! Come the day! I have so few blogging friends left these days… goodness… you and a couple of others… where to from here? If I was a chicken I’d cross the road!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. umashankar

        It’s is the saddest of times, it is the maddest of times, it is the age of hokum, it is the age of baloney, it is the epoch of deceipt, it is the epoch of incivility….

        We are A Few Good Men. We will cross that road when we must and leave the rest in the dust.

        (With apologies to Darles Chickens)

        Liked by 2 people

        Reply
  2. crederae

    hi Bruce.
    This was enjoyable.*smiles*there have been weeks for me (not good ones but usually life is awesome for me) but some weeks where I simply die every day and one day seems as
    good as the other for dying.haha.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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