Phoebe was stuck on her doctoral thesis.
“This,” said she, “will be my nemesis.”
So her tutor told her to study something relevant,
Such as “The Feminine Side of Hannibal’s Elephants”.
Well this thesis got her a summa cum laude
(She was not one to hide her talents under a shroud, eh?)
It was a marvellous masculine presumption to derail:
Proving that not all of Hannibal’s elephants were male.
Females are tough; females are strong;
Those who think only menfolk are robust have got it all wrong.
Hannibal couldn’t have crossed over the Alps
Without the aid of non-male pachyderm helps.
Phoebe took up a lectureship
As a result of studying elephant bits.
She discourses full time in Women’s Studies,
Teaching men how to be emotionally honest with their buddies.
There’s a wealth of inquiry waiting to be done.
Phoebe’s next article has already begun;
She researches you see, as well as teaches,
So she’s writing a paper on “Feminine Endings in Churchill’s Speeches”.
To hear the poem read aloud click HERE.
An updated Ogden Nash? In the twenty-first century? My God, what do we make of that?
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Thank you. That is praise indeed!
We should all have a splash
At writing Ogden Nash!
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Feminine endings in Churchill’s speeches. I grinned through the whole poem, especially the part about studying elephant bits.
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Thanks, Lisa! I enjoyed writing it!
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I second Thomas Davis….you give Ogden a decent run for his money. And I am absolutely in love with the rhyming of “thesis” with “nemesis”….
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Thank you. My favourite rhyme was “shroud, eh?”!
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“Cum laude” with “shroud, eh”. I bow to thee.
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Thanks – the phrase rather tickled me!
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Me too!
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Thank you!
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I liked ‘shroud, eh?’ best too – it’s not at all a rhyming stretch and most applicable culturally 🙂
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Yeah it is eh!
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Bruce Almighty, this has earned you a summa cum laude from the Myrtleford University.
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Thank you.
Although I would like a rotten tomata
To be thrown at me at Wangaratta.
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That can be easily arranged,
Many Wangarattians being deranged.
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Mine was MEANT to read:
Although I wouldN’T like a rotten tomata!!
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Too bad. The mob is all ready for you.
But, it still might be alright,
If I sneak you into Bright.
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All right. I am devastated.
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Take consolation in… in… in…
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😊😄😂
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A witty ditty – very funny
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Thank you, Derrick!
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Definitely gave Ogden a challenge – but wow! from Hannibal’s elephants to Churchill?
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When I was at a certain Ivy-League University (President and Mrs Obama apparently went to the same one) you could take a paper called “Jesus as Woman”. That inspired both the elephants and Churchill!
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Sounds like what you might encounter there. I see that it didn’t corrupt you!
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I didn’t take that paper!!
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This one is such a gem, Bruce!
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Thank you very much! That’s very kind.
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