24 thoughts on “Poem 20B: Frog – a cinquain

  1. Cynthia Jobin

    I really like this one. It beautifully follows the prescribed form of an American cinquain as a single vivid image with a “turn” at the end. In addition it has other virtues of poetry in general…..such as the resonance of “tad too old” to “tadpole”, the nice assonance of frog, hop, log, rock, and the word “croaked” used literally and figuratively. (Since it’s your poem, I vote for the figurative, idiomatic meaning of “croaked” at the end.) Bravo!

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    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Thank you. And yes, croaked figuratively indeed – although as you know in a poem one can do everything at once! I was disappointed that I couldn’t make croaked a single-stressed-two-syllable word (for perfection sake) – and I would not like croak-ed – although the sound of it might be even more frog-like. The “turn at the end” is the hard part, and I think the most crucial aspect of the American cinquain. (Am I right?)

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      1. Cynthia Jobin

        I think you are right. The turn makes the poem more than a simple description or visual image. It’s the double meaning of “croaked” that facilitates the turn in this case.( For a reader who does not know that English idiom, it might remain a simple description.) You can get a two-syllable (almost) sound out of the last line by overemphasizing the “t” sound at the end of “croaked”—almost separating it from the word. I did that, reading it aloud, and it reminded me of a ‘tsk…tsk..” 🙂

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  2. Thomas Davis

    Your comment on Cynthia Jobin’s blog led me here. I love forms, and you, as she says above, get the cinquain right. You manage the turn perfectly. This reminds me of the work of the Persian poets mostly, especially the way you work up to the wonderful last line. This is fine work.

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