882. I’m so tired of being rich


I’m so tired of being rich. People don’t realise how tedious money can become. I’ll give an example to illustrate what I mean.

Every day the cook would ask if there was anything special I would like for the evening meal. After a while – rather quickly actually – I ran out of ideas. I suggested to the cook that he make up his own mind, as long as he maintained his usual quality. That’s what he’s paid for. Well! You’ve no idea what happened! He served up a wild venison dish. I don’t like wild game particularly, and this meat was far too strong. It might’ve looked fancy, but … yuk! After that, I had to replace the cook with one who toned down the flavours a bit, thank heavens.

Then when my birthday came I said I was tired of all this fancy food and wanted something plain. Perhaps a rissole in a bun – something simple like that. What sort of salad would I like in the bun? A bit of red onion? No, no, no! Cheese? No, no, no! Just a rissole in a bun. Like poor people have every day.

So that’s what I got. It was disgusting. Never again. And it was a top-of-the-range bun. I now understand what poor people have to put up with all the time. I have instructed the cook: once a month, when he’s foraging for groceries, he’s to buy a spare tin of cat food and leave it in the Salvation Army bin at the supermarket. If the poor people don’t have a cat, I’m sure it would be a treat for them to eat it themselves.

Life is certainly more satisfying now that I’m doing my bit.

26 thoughts on “882. I’m so tired of being rich

  1. Cynthia Jobin

    You have given us insight as to how “the other half” (or as they say in my country, “The One Percent”) has its crosses to bear. Never having had much more than the proverbial pot-to-piss-in, I can now see how difficult it must be for the rich. Thank you for enlightening me. ( I still wouldn’t mind a bit more of that filthy lucre meself.)

    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      (Well – so would I!) – which of course is always the danger of writing fiction in the first person! At one school I worked at, there were cleaners, who when spring cleaning the library during the summer vacation period, sorted all the books on the shelves from tallest to shortest!

      1. Cynthia Jobin

        Which reminds me of the time I was teaching an English class to High School freshmen, showing them how to format a bibliography. The sample bibliography I used had several entries with the name of the publisher Little, Brown, Inc. When they turned in their assignments ( construct a bibliography of five of your school textbooks) several of them entered the size and cover color of the books, instead of the publisher…i.e.. Large Black, Medium-Sized Red,….etc.

  2. Let's CUT the Crap!

    I don’t want money or riches, not worries about what’s happening to my money when the market doesn’t work properly, or that my staff may be stealing from me. I don’t want a cook either because then I’ll grow faster than my money. 😀 😀
    Poor man. A whole tin of cat food a month. Hope that doesn’t break the bank. o_O

  3. thecontentedcrafter

    I had to rush off and walk the dog before it rained ……….. I didn’t rush fast enough and got drowned…………… Now the sun is out again! Sigh!! All the money in the world could not prevent this from occurring. I have riches enough, not of the monetary type, and give more than a tin of cat food a month to those worse off. I believe there has been some studies done indicating that the poor give more – per capita so to speak – than the rich.

    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Sorry to hear you got wet (and not behind the ears). If you do Meals-on-Wheels – there are many people getting looked after for nothing and they have priceless silverware sitting in their cabinets. I have no idea why they would be keeping it!

  4. arlingwoman

    Drawing the wrong conclusions results in cat food tins in the Salvation Army bin. I did get a chuckle from this. Apparently rich people are meaner than the rest of us (both senses of that word).

  5. noelleg44

    You’ve certainly given us ‘food’ for thought! I don’t think I would mind being rich at all – my cook could make dietetic meals and I could get some of these godawful pounds off. Plus I could give more $$$ to the Salvation Army – my grandmother’s favorite charity!


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