799. Dear Julia

887julia

Dear Julia

I am outraged. Your recipe for oxtail stew suggests a cupful of red wine. That is disgusting. You are doing nothing other than encouraging drunken alcoholism. I left the wine out before taking up your suggestion of cooking the oxtail slowly for five hours! Five hours! The meat cooked quickly. It had gone brown which surely is a sign that something’s cooked. I took it off the stove after thirty minutes.

As for the celery, I left that out too. My family are not rabbits. Also the carrots. And the potatoes got the heave-ho; they’re so unimaginative. You’d think being a popular chef on television and elsewhere that you could find something more imaginative than potatoes.

A pinch of salt! Drag yourself at least into the nineteenth century. Haven’t you heard of hardening of the arteries? I left the salt out too. And those other disgusting herbs that you wanted put in, like a bay leaf and some rosemary. Dead foliage I call them.

In conclusion I would like to say that I thought the end product was rather bland. I do wish you’d stop foistering your mediocre recipes on the gullible public. My three sons demanded proper food, so I had to open a couple of cans of baked beans.

Signed: A Proper Cook

49 thoughts on “799. Dear Julia

  1. cindy knoke

    Here is what I suggest, return all the veges. Add garlic and onion sauted in a bit of butter and bay leaf and thyme and any other spice you have growing. Add two cups of wine, 1/2 a bottle, maybe 2T’s of brandy, hmmmmmm what else you got to add
    in???? I love Julia’s Beef Bourginon and use a whole bottle of burgundy and a touch of brandy or cognac. When am I coming for dinner?????

    Liked by 4 people

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      LOL Cindy! I have just had an entire cattle beast put in the freezer so you’re welcome any time. You bring the brandy and the burgundy because mine seems to disappear while waiting for the meat to defrost!

      Liked by 4 people

      Reply

Gentle thoughts and expressions of astoundedness are both gratefully accepted.

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