742. How time passes

742record

Russell was bewildered. He went to see the heart specialist. The heart specialist said, “Don’t go buying any long-playing records.”

Russell was born in the twenty-first century. He didn’t have a clue what the doctor meant. He went home and asked his mother. She was born in the early eighties. She said she thought a long-playing record was some sort of contraption for playing music on.

Russell’s last words were, “What the hell would I want a long-playing record for?”

59 thoughts on “742. How time passes

  1. thecontentedcrafter

    But he was only 15! Surely not………..? Despite that – time passes ever more quickly and today’s latest is tomorrow’s obsolete. I think that soon we will lap ourselves on the race track of modern life!!

    Reply
          1. Cynthia Jobin

            The closest thing we have to the bush shirt is the lumberjack shirt…the loud plaids and colors–most often red and black squares—are quite the same as your bush shirt only the lumberjack is usually made out of flannel, not wool (unless it’s wool flannel?) I like ’em….they remind me of pine trees and campfires…

            When I moved a couple of years ago, I left behind stacks and stacks of 33rpm record albums. I think they were called long playing because they had many songs/pieces on them, as opposed to the little 45 rpm and even earlier 78 rpm records I remember from childhood, which played only one song per side of the disk.

            Now I’m really feeling old. And I’m not going to go out and buy a long-playing record.

            Reply
            1. Bruce Goodman Post author

              Yes – come to think of it – I’ve heard the name lumberjack for the jacket – which is a word we know because of a certain schoolboy bawdy song… The long-playing records I remember well! Your 33rpms would possible fetch a penny or two in a few years. My bush shirt is dark blue and black. Oh I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok… !

              Reply
          2. Yvonne

            Oh boy, I just clicked on a bunch of the items listed as ‘items of kiwiana’. There were enough that were familiar to make my glasses fog up with spilt tears.

            Reply
  2. chrisnelson61

    This is a great take on how time and technology leave us standing still. I often find myself having to check myself so that younger colleagues (not to mention the children) know what I’m on about!

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Are you saying that my tapes are obsolete? 😀 Actually, I found an old 78 record that my mother’s brother sent home from WW2. He recorded it in New York on the way from Malta to somewhere else… I think the war ship had berthed in NY. He never came back from the war…

      Reply
          1. Cynthia Jobin

            The turntables now come with a thing that allows you to adjust the center hole and accommodate both 45’s and LP’s. The sound, though, is so odd-sounding, now that we’ve gotten used to more sophisticated audio, starting with the CD’s…..

            Reply
            1. arlingwoman

              Oh, that’s interesting. I’ve been thinking of buying one of those new record players, mostly to play some of the albums I haven’t been able to duplicate with MP3. I wondered if I’d like that needle crackle…

              Reply
  3. noelleg44

    It’s mind boggling that my kids don’t know what an LP is, an eight track tape player, a 45. When I told them the first roller skates I ever owned were metal and you put on over your shoes, tightening with a skate key, they just laughed their heads off.

    Reply
  4. arlingwoman

    Bruce, you did not show up in my reader tonight, but I knew you posted daily, so I ran you down–electronically, of course. Technology is so fast now. For forty years, there were 33s and 45s and then there were 8 tracks and cassettes and CDs and now MP3s. I never had 8 tracks, but I’ve had everything else and my family has an old crank victrola that plays 78s. The trick is not to get it moving too fast….

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      I didn’t think it showed up because no one looked at the posting for ages. Perhaps WordPress are still trying to figure out if a Long-playing record is referring to something distasteful! I missed out on the 8-track as well… and these days I don’t have anything to play music on 😦 (Well the computer with headphones)…

      Reply
      1. Cynthia Jobin

        Ah…now I get it. You screwed with the speed adjustment lever of your record player…..then everything would sound like the chipmunks or donald duck or anything that had just swallowed a gutful of helium gas…..

        Reply
        1. Bruce Goodman Post author

          The old wind up gramophones you had to change the needle because it could wear down really fast. (And we never had quarters 😦 I am presuming a quarter is a US25cent bit?)

          Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      My first record was Peter Sellars and Sophie Loren singing “Goodness Gracious Me”. On the other side of the record was the song “They’re removing grandpa’s grave to build the sewer” which my father forbade us to play!

      Reply
      1. Cynthia Jobin

        The Clancy Brothers do a version of that verboten song, only they have it “They’re Moving Father’s Grave to Build a Sewer”….it’s funny, but I think “Goodness Gracious Me” with Sellars and Loren is even funnier!

        Reply

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