729. The best of friends

729friends

Tom and Seamus had been best friends for many, many years. Their families always took their vacation together at the lake. They were forever taking the mickey out of each other; pulling each other’s leg; having each other on…

Then one day, quite separately one from another, Tom and Seamus dropped dead.

The first thing they said upon arriving in the nether world was, “What on earth are you doing here?”

“I suppose we’d better find the pearly gates and see what the story is,” said Tom.

And there they were: the gates! Saint Peter was sitting at his desk looking rather bored.

“So,” said Saint Peter to Seamus, “I haven’t had time to check. What’s Tom been like? Has he been good?”

“He’s been the paradigm of goodness,” said Seamus. “Always kind. Integrity is what he has. If he says it, then it’s true.”

“And you,” said Saint Peter to Tom, “What’s Seamus been like?”

“The biggest bastard on God’s earth,” joked Tom. “I’d chuck him into hell if I was you.”

Unfortunately, Peter believed both.

69 thoughts on “729. The best of friends

              1. Cynthia Jobin

                I don’t know how you would spell that; it’s all becoming too arcane and recherché for me. There’s just no word for it that would please everyone, refined or not. My dad always said some people wouldn’t say s**t even if they had a mouthful!

                Liked by 1 person

                Reply
                    1. Yvonne

                      Oh, please leave that for a while longer. My Canadian niece (a silent follower) needs to hear this, but she’s being all healthy at yoga right now.

                      I laughed in a very raucous manner about the poop all over the place. We’re kinda childish, I think! And, that’s good.

                      Like

  1. Oscar Alejandro Plascencia

    Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ! (That’s my diabolical laughter.) Peter sounds rightly bored after eons of gate duty. Probably denies entry at random just to spice things up a bit and get a kick out of people’s expression when the cloud vanishes from beneath their feet.
    Gotta love Tom. True to himself till the end and thereafter!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      I agree about the story’s obtuseness. I had to read it several times as well, and then I’m not sure if it is right… Even though one says “If he says it, then it’s true” it’s still not clearly clear!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

Gentle thoughts and expressions of astoundedness are both gratefully accepted.

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