707. Rowena’s food fairs

707insects

When the Reverend Bevin Barbridge was appointed to his new Episcopal Church of Saint Cuthbald in the Woods, he found the building itself considerably dilapidated.

He needed to raise money for a new roof. Rowena was the one! She could organise events with a paper bag over her head. And she did! She organised a Village Fair with the theme of Why Not Eat Insects? People flocked from all over, especially the youth. Who wouldn’t be daring enough to try fried crickets or a locust fritter? Barbequed grubs! Worms boiled in wild bee honey! Fried moths with ginger! What a marvellous success the fair was! What a marvellous money maker!

The following year the Reverend Bevin Barbridge needed to call on Rowena’s expertise again. The church building needed painting. This year the theme was Offal can be Offally Good. There were sweetmeats (which Rowena pointed out were calf pancreases), there were hearts, and brains, and livers, and kidneys, and oxtails, and hoof jellies, and mountain oysters, and sheep’s eyes, and… you name it, it was there.

No one came.

46 thoughts on “707. Rowena’s food fairs

  1. redosue

    There is NO accounting for taste. I was raised on an offal diet. Nothing makes my stomach leap than a merry dish of tripe. Mmmm! Good ol’ Scottish country cooking.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Actually I love all offal – but over here now the local supermarkets don’t sell it anymore because no one buys it. The butchers send it all to get made into dog food. So it’s getting harder and harder to buy.

      Liked by 1 person

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  2. Oscar Alejandro Plascencia

    Rowena was as stubborn and proud as a mountain goat, she’d counted on her previous success and purchased fifty pounds of almost every variety meat. The next morn she set up shop right in front of the church doors of this deadwood village. She spent all night grounding and stuffing the grand mixture of raw spilth into the lamb intestines. The Breakfast Sausage was a success! Not a link was left. And the riffraff villagers even volunteered to do the painting!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Keith Channing

    The image puts me in mind of an incident in Tanzania back in ’83. The cuttings in the road site I was working on had recently been seeded with a mix of fast- and slow-growing grasses to stabilise them, when there was an invasion of African Army Worm (Spodoptera exempta).
    This was a reportable pest, so we notified the relevant department in Dar-es-Salaam. A few days later, a gang arrived with pesticide spray and killed them all.
    I asked my radio operator, who was my mentor in all things Swahili, what the local name was for these creatures. He told me it was chakula.
    Chakula, in kiswahili, means food!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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