Thora was the epitome of both meddlesomeness and overbearingness. She was therefore rather taken aback, when she died and arrived at Heaven’s Pearly Gates, to be made to wait in line. She jumped the queue little by little and ended up at the front quicker than Saint Peter had originally intended.
Thora was further aghast. No, she couldn’t go straight through. Would she mind sitting over at that side table there and filling out a questionnaire?
“Of course I would mind,” said Thora. “A questionnaire?”
“Do it!” said Saint Peter.
Question One: List five people on earth who should be the next to die. State why.
“An excellent question,” thought Thora. “There’s Ena Bisset; she had that affair with the mechanic last week when she was getting an oil change for her car. Then there’s Tania Schonberger; she drinks far far too much and hides her gin bottles under the bed. And there’s Sharon de Silva; she…”
“Excuse me! Excuse me!” called Thora to Saint Peter. “Why do I have to make this list? Haven’t you been watching what goes on down there?”
Thora stood. She strode over.
“Step aside,” she said to Saint Peter. “You’ve been at it two thousand years and need a break. Okay, hurry up you lazy people, we have to get rid of this queue.”
Thora pushed some people through and rejected others. She worked tirelessly all day. She was in her element. Not once did she have to consult the notes Saint Peter had left. She knew everyone’s business by heart.
So if you happen to have the opportunity in the not-too-distant future of “passing through”, don’t be surprised to see Thora in charge.
This is hilarious. “Thora” is such a descriptive, apt name for this meddlesome, overbearing creature. I hope she’s worn out by the time I “pass through,” and that Saint Peter’s back manning the gates. Good stuff!
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Thank you, Susan! I do hope that you won’t get to meet her in the foreseeable future!
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We’ll, Peter needed a break! And now we know the true origin of heavenly thunder! Guess Peter will be taking a sabbatical seeing as how Thora is in ghee element!
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Thora is in her element!
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I thought for a moment with the ghee, that you’d gone into Indian cooking.
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Oh no! The only Indian I’ve gone into wasn’t fat at all. 😜
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😀 😀 😀 I’m glad that’s clarified.
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Clear and nutty.
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Nutty! Thanks.
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We’re still talking about the ghee, right?
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LOL! Ghee, I don’t know…
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At our age…at this stage in the game…we really should know.
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AND – I’ve gotta do some work!!!!
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No worries. You’re as quick as lightning!
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“ghee” element would be the very antithesis of Thora. (I can’t seem to get away from the butter theme this week.) 🙂
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Spread the joy! And for those of you who haven’t read/listened to Cynthia’s butter poem, it’s here:
http://littleoldladywho.net/2015/08/14/ode-to-a-condiment-2/
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Claw away all you might, you’ll never get away from it with those butterfingers.
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Thanks! Thunderous applause!
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⚡️ That was a lightning response! ⚡️
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I don’t usually flash.
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Well now, today’s visitors will be in for a treat!
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I can’t. I think I left my coat hanging on someone’s car antenna.
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Oh, was that yours? Have given it away to charity. 😕
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I especially like the way you used dialogue, in this story, to express character as well as moving the narrative along.
I don’t expect I’ll have Thora to worry about, since I doubt I’ll be going her way.
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Thanks! If Thora keeps going the way she is, who knows what direction she might be sent!
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I am glad I’m Hindu!
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LOL!!! And thanks for reading the story!
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That was hilarious. Thora taking over the job. Haha. Of course a personality like this can’t easily just be pushed in one of the doors, the door waits for her.
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Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it, and yes – the door must wait!
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I wonder what St. Pete has in mind for old Thora – it can’t be anything good – is there a sequel?
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I’m not sure! Perhaps you could ask him yourself? 😀
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Shouldn’t Thora be at the gates to Valhalla?
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She wouldn’t have the patience to study a Saga. Shove one this way or that. And as quickly as possible…
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Yeah, but she’d have the hammer!
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I hope I live a very, very long life 🙂
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LOL! And she’ll be long gone!
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“Thora was the epitome of both meddlesomeness and overbearingness. She was therefore rather taken aback, when she died and arrived at Heaven’s Pearly Gates, to be made to wait in line. She jumped the queue little by little and ended up at the front quicker than Saint Peter had originally intended.”
Just wonderful. Superb 🙂
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Thank, Alex. You can comment any time!
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You give me the creeps! How have the mighty fallen!
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