665. It’s a boy!

© Bruce Goodman 6 August 2015


Moira and Archie had five daughters: Muriel, Betty, Grace, Mary, and Eunice. They loved their daughters greatly, but sort of hoped for a son. Don’t get me wrong; if they had five sons they would’ve hoped for a daughter.

Archie read and practised everything he could find to increase the chances of creating a boy. He drank lots of coffee before doing the deed. Apparently coffee greatly excited the male spermatozoa and they swam to the egg in an enthusiastic sprint.

He ate less fruit and vegetables because little X-chromosomes liked their fruit and vegetables too much. In fact, he had a strictly alkaline diet because little Y-chromosomes disliked acid. He upped his intake of sodium and potassium, and of calcium and magnesium. He consulted the Chinese Lunar Calendar. He hit the chocolate, because according to the copy of Women Today and Yesterday in the dentist’s waiting room, skinny people produce girls.

And you know what? It worked! It worked! They had a boy! This was a few years back.

Today, David (or Davinia as she is now known) is the apple of her father’s eye.

25 thoughts on “665. It’s a boy!

          1. Cynthia Jobin

            I wish you two would stop imagining bathrooms….I had five brothers. it was my job to clean the toilet daily…for years when I was growing up…and to clean the nearby floor, walls, water tank….etc….

            Liked by 5 people

  1. thecontentedcrafter

    I didn’t see that one coming – though really by now, I should have! I’ve been meaning to ask -Where DO you get your names from? I finished your autobiography. I loved it and there needs to be a second volume! I recommend it to friends 🙂 Shall I mention it in a blog post perhaps?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Bruce Goodman Post author

      Thanks! You are welcome to promote me!!!! Thank you for reading it. I get the names out of the daily obituaries in the Auckland NZ Herald online! Sometimes from the obituaries in the Dominion-Post and sometimes from the Christchurch Press. It’s a good way of keeping up with other people’s deaths!


  2. Yvonne

    G’day! Have you discontinued comments on your posts, or has WordPress instituted another of its surprise changes?? (There’s no provision to comment on your 2 posts today.)

    Liked by 1 person


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