650. The correction of misinformation

© Bruce Goodman 22 July 2015

It really is time to clear up a good deal of misinformation about the author, Jane Austen. No, she wasn’t the happy spinster, known affectionately as “Aunt Jane” to her nieces and nephews. She was married! To me! Yes! You heard right! Jane wanted to keep our marriage a secret, and a secret it stayed; and for a reason.

It all began when I finished my first novel, Sense and Sensibility; Jane collaborated with her sister, Cassandra, in a dastardly deed. They locked me up and published the novel under Jane’s name. I went on writing further novels in my “prison cell”. They even had the gall to change the name of First Impressions to Pride and Prejudice.

Jane died (thank heavens quite early) and Cassandra forced me to write several further novels which she had published under Jane’s name posthumously. Posthumously!

Cassandra then destroyed most of the correspondence she’d had with Jane. It was an effort to cover up all evidence.

Now that Cassandra’s dead, this is a plea to all those kind people who have purchased (and even read) copies of my novels. Please get a quill and cross out the name of Jane Austen and replace it with mine. Let justice be served!