513. Doggone

513doggoned

Oh come on. Don’t give me that. You’re full of bullshit. Half the world eats dog. There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s a meat like every other animal.

I don’t know why they don’t sell it in the shops. They sell sheep, and cows, and pigs. Why not dog, for goodness sake? You’d think people would’ve got over this namby-pamby nonsense by now. It’s good meat; a cross between guinea-pig and cat I reckon. Maybe cat and hamster. Although not as strong in taste as domestic horse.

Of course, if the dog’s old it can be a bit tough. But most toughness can be solved by cooking it in a slow cooker – say 8 hours on low, something like that. Then there are lots of sauces you can tip over it too.

What’s that? You don’t like eating your pet pooch? Get over it. It’s a question of mind over matter. Although I don’t reckon this poodle’s as nice as your canary.

Gentle thoughts and expressions of astoundedness are both gratefully accepted.

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